Overlord Challenge Thing

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Overlord Challenge Thing

Post by DoS Archive » Sat Oct 30, 2004 1:03 pm

From: dreystarke@aol.com (DreyStarke)
Date: 06 Jul 2000 12:25:36 EDT

Yeah, I've challenged for Overlord, and since I already know I'm going to win, I'm going to share my demands as the Overlord. Since, technically, I should be Overlord right now.

Anyway, on with the demands...

1) I want a portrait of myself, 24ft by 24ft and hung on a wall in the Arena for all to see. I'm having an artist do the drawing for me.

2) When you enter a ring to duel, you're going to bow to me (or if I'm not there, the portrait) or pay five gold if you refuse to bow. That gold will either go to charity or for my own needs.

3) If possible, the portrait will be nude. But since Val says that it probably wouldn't be allowed in the Arena itself, two more portraits of myself in nude are going to be posted in the Women's and Men's restrooms. Please don't do anything more than doing your business.

4) Every hour on the hour an anthem all about me should, and shall be going. Everybody has to sing to it who is in the Arena at that time. The words to the Drey Anthem will soon follow this post in a matter of days. Women will put their hand on their bosom, and men will put it on their forehead. Left hand.

5) I'm having a chair handcrafted specifically for me to mold comfortably into my rump. It is to be placed in the Arena at a place where it is easiest to watch the rings. If anyone sits in it, they're to be executed.

6) Every child born shall bear the name "Drey," or middle name.

7) The Overlord Drey gets to deflower all the daughter's of the right age, and if anyone disrespects this wish and goes right ahead, their head shall be lopped off. Unless, of course, she's ugly. I claim no respnsibility for the bastards produced by that rule.

8) Anybody who loses to me in the rings receives a pin which reads, "I got my ass kicked by Drey and lived!" This will not be pinned to your clothing, but pinned and cemented to your flesh.

9) Anyone who actually comes out ahead and wins (which is almost inconceivable) will receive a free Drey T-Shirt, which will read the following: "My death has been scheduled for tomorrow morning."

10) Everyday I walk in I shall request certain women to follow certain procedures. This includes fanning me, feeding me grapes or any other type of tasty foods, dancing for me nude or semi-nude, nursing my wounds, and whorshipping or bowing to the ground I stand above. You can expect Jonalyn, Onyx, Arane, and a variety of others performing the foot and shoulder massages. If anyone tries to refuse and run, I will have their sex changed.

Thank you everyone. You will all realize who's your master in the morning.

Regards from your future Overlord,





- Drey D'erest Sanchez SIZE=5 PTSIZE=16>Starke
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Post by DoS Archive » Sat Oct 30, 2004 1:04 pm

From: flavorlessgum@aol.com (Flavorless Gum)
Date: 06 Jul 2000 18:25:13 EDT

Drey,
You are incredibly unoriginal. Didn't Jesse make a post almost exactly like this on the Fist corkboard? Damn, get a life.




Dustin Manjahcapery

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Holder of the Yellow Opal, Moonberyl.
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Post by DoS Archive » Sat Oct 30, 2004 1:04 pm

From: dreystarke@aol.com (DreyStarke)
Date: 06 Jul 2000 18:56:01 EDT

I wouldn't know. Not like I ever read those boards... Perhaps you should just appreciate the fact that you're getting a future Overlord that can whoop your ass. Or has that also zoomed past your mind?

Since I'm in control and Dusty decided to speak up, I'm making a new rule.

11) If anyone writes to Drey on these boards it has to be in good-nature and he has to like you. You will either have your hand chopped off or your head removed. The choice will be at Drey's leisure.





- Drey D'erest Sanchez SIZE=5 PTSIZE=16>Starke
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Post by DoS Archive » Sat Oct 30, 2004 1:04 pm

From: novagreys@aol.com (Nova GreyS)
Date: 06 Jul 2000 19:41:14 EDT

And Nova Grey Shadow's laughter rings out through the Arena in the early evening hours.
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Post by DoS Archive » Sat Oct 30, 2004 1:04 pm

From: onyxsolare@aol.com (OnyxSolare)
Date: 06 Jul 2000 20:34:07 EDT



Drey,
You'd be tortured with a thousand cuts, doused in salt, your fingers and toes hammered into oblivion, a ligature around your family jewels until they turn black and rot off, and then put out of your misery in a small cell full of very hungry rats if ever I was forced to touch such a thing as your feet. Needless to say, you can't make me do anything, regardless of what rank you are. No hard feelings.

Hugs and kisses,
Onyx
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Post by DoS Archive » Sat Oct 30, 2004 1:04 pm

From: zenithi@aol.com (Zenith I)
Date: 06 Jul 2000 20:51:35 EDT

Your absurd demands amused me, Drey. But even if you do win, you won't hold it for long enough to have any of them fulfilled, you know.
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Post by DoS Archive » Sat Oct 30, 2004 1:05 pm

From: flavorlessgum@aol.com (Flavorless Gum)
Date: 06 Jul 2000 21:25:01 EDT

>Perhaps you should just appreciate the fact that you're getting a future
>Overlord that can whoop your ass.

Big deal, I've beaten you one less time then you've beaten me. Anyone can beat anyone on any given day.




Dustin Manjahcapery

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Post by DoS Archive » Sat Oct 30, 2004 1:05 pm

From: gnrtdrgoon@aol.com (GnrtDrgoon)
Date: 06 Jul 2000 22:49:49 EDT



Drey,

I've been silent long enough with how your attitude has been turning. Consider your services with the Company of the Dragon to no longer be needed. I will not allow a person who behaves as you to come back on my team.

Grow up.

G
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Post by DoS Archive » Sat Oct 30, 2004 1:05 pm

From: ianmackenzie@aol.com (Ian MacKenzie)
Date: 07 Jul 2000 00:24:21 EDT

"Drey,
You are incredibly unoriginal. Didn't Jesse make a post almost exactly like this on the Fist corkboard?"

Even worse, it sounds just like the rules I was publicly rambling about when I claimed the Overlordship myself, which should be no small embarrasment to Baron Starke...

Regards,
Ian Rex.
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Post by DoS Archive » Sat Oct 30, 2004 1:05 pm

From: sidarthax@aol.com (Sidartha x)
Date: 07 Jul 2000 00:31:45 EDT

You demanded nude portraits of yourself be put up in the locker rooms, Ian? My goodness, I should read more carefully.

~Sid
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Post by DoS Archive » Sat Oct 30, 2004 1:05 pm

From: ianmackenzie@aol.com (Ian MacKenzie)
Date: 07 Jul 2000 00:35:35 EDT

"You demanded nude portraits of yourself be put up in the locker rooms, Ian? My goodness, I should read more carefully."

Well, not JUST like my demands, but much in the same spirit...

Actually, I'd demanded nude portraits of all female duelers be placed in MY locker room.

Ian Rex.
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Post by DoS Archive » Sat Oct 30, 2004 1:06 pm

From: dreystarke@aol.com (DreyStarke)
Date: 07 Jul 2000 00:42:09 EDT

There's a difference. I'm going to be Overlord, Ian, and you claimed Overlordship. So I'm allowed.

Ha.





- Drey D'erest Sanchez SIZE=5 PTSIZE=16>Starke
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Post by DoS Archive » Sat Oct 30, 2004 1:06 pm

From: sidarthax@aol.com (Sidartha x)
Date: 07 Jul 2000 00:44:44 EDT

"Actually, I'd demanded nude portraits of all female duelers be placed in MY locker room."

Sorry, you're only alowed one nude portrait in your locker room, Ian.

~Sid
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Post by DoS Archive » Sat Oct 30, 2004 1:06 pm

From: ianmackenzie@aol.com (Ian MacKenzie)
Date: 07 Jul 2000 00:47:34 EDT

"Sorry, you're only alowed one nude portrait in your locker room, Ian."

Only one?

Okay, I guess I'll start taking applications, then.

~ian
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Post by DoS Archive » Sat Oct 30, 2004 1:06 pm

From: casmaxim@aol.com (Cas Maxim)
Date: 07 Jul 2000 00:48:26 EDT

>Actually, I'd demanded nude portraits of all female duelers be placed in MY
>locker room.
>

Even Drakewyn? Ewww.....

In jest,
Cassius Gaius Maximius
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