Song of Stardust

[DoF Archive]

Date: 5/28/1998 2:43 PM Central Daylight Time
From: Kyttn


Kyttn leaned against the balcony rail and looked out over the spaceport. There was no way even her sharp eyes could see the Willow from that spot, but she tried anyway. The view was so different here than from the Willow porch where all was beauty, nature and quiet reflection. Here in her penthouse apartment, her valuables trembled as the shuttles shook the building when they flew over. While the lights of the spaceport were as aritfically beautiful in their own way as the vastness of stars above the Willow, and the mists and fumes from the ships lent an ethereal quality to the harsh reality of the machines, it felt strange to be back. It was stranger still to be alone. Since returning to her apartment, where Nate's blood still stained the carpet from when the Col. Simon imposter had broken his nose, she had been with no one for longer than a few hours in the Outback. The odd thing about that was that she didn't feel lonely. She missed Nate and recalled him with awe and wonder frequently if not all the time, but she knew he had to do what was required of him by his ... faith...for lack of a better explanation. At least, for now. The memory of something Robert said flooded her suddenly. "One of us will die one day for what we believe in," he'd said of himself and of Nate. She stared out across the spaceport and would have prayed that it wouldn't be Nate, but she didn't know who to pray to.She remembered other things that the brothers had said to her in turns. "You are free and I like that about you. Anything I would try to change you into would only damage the special person that you are..." Robert had once said it and it was clear he still meant it. He always gave her room to be herself. Nate had, but there was an underlying desire in Nate to fence her in, she could feel it in him, always, lingering. Perhaps that was the singularmost significant reason he'd left her behind. He, like his brother, sought not to change her even when his own desire was to do precisely that. Maybe the most significant thing Nate had ever said to her was, "I love you." Perhaps Robert was determined yet not to, maybe never to, 'reach for' her. He had once said he thought it was funny that she insisted on making men come to her instead of going to them. He'd never been the sort who went to someone. He too made them come to him. If she had that power, could really make any man come to her, she would snatch Nate back from wherever he had gone and keep him safe and sound in her arms forever. With a final, soft smile, she turned her back on the view that obscured the Heartland where the stardust sang and closed the balcony doors.

[DoF Archive]

Date: 5/28/1998 4:07 PM Central Daylight Time
From: Kyttn


Two Weeks Ago...The sounds of the shuttles woke her. They woke her every night for the last week. It was enough a loss of sleep to keep her from the duels - heading for bed too early to attend the nighttime brawls, waking at all odd hours. Kyttn wasn't sure what she expected when she heard the sounds of the shuttles overhead. She'd always slept so soundly before she'd gone to the Willow. Now that she was back, she reasoned it was the 'culture shock' of the move that affected her sleep. She shouldn't be waiting for anything - but her senses were telling her something. She rolled over, her mane a mussed mat of fur and tried to get back to sleep. The late spring night was hot and her apartment uncomfortable - the whirr of the vents conditioning the air did little to lull her. They used to seem soothing; but that night they qualified as annoying. Rolling out of the bed, Kyttn crossed to the wall made up of gadgets and controls. The tri-vid was dark and she left it that way. She had no interest in the politics or businesses of this world.. except perhaps for one. She tilted her head thoughtfully. Robert had said he was in trouble. Kyt wondered if that meant the Jasmine was as well. She chuffed softly in the dark, reaching for the climate controls. "Not as if the world couldn't use one less cat-house," she purred to herself, amused. But the thought of her friend in trouble didn't please her and the humor vanished. She switched off the vents with a click and the air stilled a moment later. She padded to the balcony, pushed aside the curtains and looked out and down. It seemed quiet with the doors closed. Cracking the lock, she slid them open and listened, ears shifting this way and that. Here, the sound of a scuffle in the darkness; there, the sound of cry - perhaps a human child. In yet another place a shout followed by running feet and the blast oflaser fire. Sirens...It was not a quiet nor pastoral life, near the RhyDin Spaceport. The city built around Star's End had never been an idyllic place but somehow, it seemed worse than before. For the first time, Kyttn began to wonder if she belonged. The predator contemplating if she were meant to live among the hunted... For a moment her smile returned. She stood in the doors listening and wondering 'til the planet turned and light crept across the sky.

[DoF Archive]

Date: 6/3/1998 3:38 PM Central Daylight Time
From: Kyttn


Beginning...Kyttn held the small pack's two straps in one hand. The old olive green knapsack was Marine design. Made to fit closely, to carry the few items she needed for every day personal use and the few articles of clothing she would wear in dealing with populated areas. She could clean them along the way in rivers and streams if necessary. She had learned human survival tips from the Marines who'd given her the knapsack and passage off Mantiev. Shecombined those tips and techniques with what she had learned while fighting against Crom along side her people. She had learned more from Nate and Robert as well while on RhyDin. In fact, (along with new words,) Robert had taught her that even those she loved could be counted on to know how to provide physical pain. Kyttn smiled a private, lopsided smile. She had her credstik with enough amassed creds for emergencies. Kyttn spent very little of the cred account an old friend had set up for her when she'd had no job. She spent even less of what she'd earned as a ref in the Outback. Kyttn's entertainments rarely required money. She had her small PADD, an investment worth making, to keep in touch with the necessary people. There were a few, like Stof, Kelli and Jeremy that she could contact through the Station's net server. She had arranged to keep the apartment she owned. She'd considered selling, but the penthouse was a home, after all. It wasn't the Willow, but it was a home after all and special in that Nate's blood was here. Blood was an especially powerful connecting force to the felinoid. For her violent people, blood marked things, as much as other bodily fluids did, and it made them unique. But, not knowing when she might return, she'd contractedwith a private investigator acquaintence to come in once a week, water her plants, collect her physical mail and forward what was important. Ashly Lowell was an occasional spectator in the Outback and Kyttn had put her on retainer. The young human investigator had no reluctance on taking the job. She had claimed she wasn't an apartment sitter, but money was money. When Kyttn had offered her use of the apartment if she needed it, so long as shemaintained it, Ashly could see the value of the arrangement and reduced the cost of the retainer to a meager sum suffcient to keep her books straight for tax purposes, but well managable for Kyttn long term. With all arranged, it was time to go. Kyttn slipped her keycard into a small pocket on the side of her sack and zippered it closed. She shut the balcony doors with a snick of sound and left a small note for Ashly on the end table near the front door. Bending down, Kyttn kissed her fingertips and brushed them over the old blood stain. "Wherever you are, Nathan, I love you," she whispered.She shut the door behind her and all was quiet.

[DoF Archive]

Date: 6/9/1998 5:38 PM Central Daylight Time
From: Kyttn


Withered JasminePerhaps it was utter folly that he might be there, still, Kyttn's heart leapt in her chest as she moved up the walk to the cathouse. The Wild Jasmine, house of ill-repute, notably owned and operated by one Robert Braxxx stood silent. Robert Braxxx, Cowboy Extraodinaire, Kyttn thought with a soft mental chuff. The closer she drew to the three-storey structure, the more she noticed the damage. She had been here often looking for Robert since the day in the Outback when he'd announced to her and to Kellian that he was both retiring and going away. Kyttn had offered him a room in her penthouse. She'd been confused when he said it wouldn't be right to take it. She had reasoned since then that her friend Robert whom she loved in nearly the same way sheloved his brother Nate was protecting her ... from himself. Everytime she came to the Jasmine to try to see him since that day, she was told he was "unavailable." Then the day came when she'd visited and the place was simply empty. She had looked for employees and found none. The Jasmine was the dead carcass of a dream, it's windows reflecting only ghosts. This visit was a last attempt to find him. As she moved that silent day in early May, stalking the house for the last time as though it might leap upon her, Kyttn saw the broken windows. It was less a dead carcass now than a skeleton of it's former self. All the soul and flesh gone. Hollow eyes where glass should reflect the setting sun. The rectangular stained glass window, once bordered with vines bearing white and yellow Jasmine blossoms,that lent the old cathouse an air of distinction - almost refinement - was shattered, bits of lead hanging down, still, lifeless. There was a large, vulgar, orange notice plastered on the front door. Kyttn didn't bother reading it, she understood what had happened almost immediately. Tentatively she mounted the stairs and pushed open the unlocked door. Inside, the evidence of the rage of a man she cared for was all around her. Tables, mirrors, chairs were broken. The old piano's keys were knocked loose making it look like the mouth of some prize fighter. No moans came from above, no sounds of rythmic creaks. Kyttn set down her knapsack by the bar and looked at the jagged edges of thrown bottles, hurled glassware and the spidery destruction of the big mirror behind the old oaken bar. Indistinct gouges were in the wood and she closed her eyes, trying to imagine the scene in her head. For a moment.. lost in fantasy... Kyttn saw herself in a variation of the scene as well... Robert stood in the half dark of the oil lamps, wicks sputtering as glass after glass flew from his hand. His brown eyes were full of anger. SMASH! No one took from him what was his. CRASH! He'd leave them nothing... NOTHING to take from him. As he reached for two more smudged glasses to hurl them into the large mirror, the door opened... Kyttn entered... She shivered as the scene played on a beat or two in her head. She could imagine it, herself coming in, taking the glasses from his hands and then holding him close. Their lips touching... If she had found him there... if she could have been there for him, with him, maybe he wouldn't have hurt so much or been so angry. Maybe he would have leaned on her ... turned to her. Kyttn shook her head. He was gone, it was clear. But where? Was it human pride that took him away? Could it be that simple and that complex? She knew how he was - better than anyone perhaps but Nate. She knew what he was. She didn't have to know where he'd come from or what he'd done in his life - even though she knew so much about what he'd been and had done. To her, he was worth the knowing, worth the loving. For a moment,standing there in the desolation of the Jasmine, Kyttn felt an ache deep inside. So many times he could have visited his will upon her and she would have relented, gladly, willingly. Whatever they had shared between them was their's alone and would remain their's. Her heart would always love him, but they both would go on. Kyttn could have wished it otherwise, but she was a felinoid and lived in the moment more often than not. Roberthad pushed her along her present path, whether or not he'd wanted to, whether or not she would ever understand, for her, he had done it.She moved toward the bar, slung her sack over her shoulder and headed for the door. She tripped over a chair leg and ooomphed into a table. It was odd to have recognition for a table. But there it was. She'd brought him a gift when he'd become the manager of the Outback. That day they'd shared a drink, at this table. They'd revealed their scars, some figuratively, some very literally, and danced together. Stones, but he knew how tomove... Kyttn firmed her grip on the straps of the knapsack. Wherever Robert was, she knew he'd be alright and while she smiled as she left the Jasmine for the last time, she ached to think he would be alone.

[DoF Archive]

Date: 7/17/1998 1:45 PM Central Daylight Time
From: Kyttn


Old Friends Panth was an old and dear friend. She'd known him as long as she'd known Jake - having met him when Jake brought her back from Mantiev and introduced her to the dueling crowd in the Outback. Jake, Panth and Siera they'd become special to her in a short time. She knew that Siera was dead - felt it anew with a pang in her heart - and knew Jake had moved on to another life; but she hadn't seen Panth in ages. What brought him to mind on her walkaboutwasn't clear. She'd been out and about for weeks already, and missing everyone just seemed to come to her that night. She reasoned it was because she'd been briefly called back into that world and reminded of what she was living without as she traveled on her quest. Many things were on her mind as she enjoyed the flickering fire she'd built. Many things indeed. The sky overhead was dark with growing cloud-cover. A summer storm was imminent and she hadn't checked the standings for this week's brute award. Thomas would be seething with impatience that she was late with it again. Kyttn chuffed in good humor. It was mattering less and less to her that things were done on time or that she was alone. Something about it eased her mind. No one to look to for guidance - only herself. Noone to please, though sometimes she missed that. No one to mind or give over her will to, whch seemed refreshing. She never considered Nate someone she had to please or obey or give over her own will to; she merely wanted to do those things with Nate. But even though she was alone, she wasn't lonely and she knew in her heart that she would see Nate sometime again. The comfort of that thought transcended the quiet of the night to give her a peace within. Still, she had many questions that only the wilderness and the depths of her mind seemed likely toanswer. She'd gone back out into the plains and forests after her one brief visit back to the Outback. She'd found that Rask had left her email via RhyDin.net when she checked her portable computer that she was carrying with her. She did it to fulfill her job as awarder of the brute of the week and rarely contacted anyone but Thomas with it. Maybe she was relying on it unconsciously but she didn't think so. She smiled when she realized she could leavethe PADD there and wouldn't miss it.The email had told her that she was needed to cover him in the Outback. Seemed she was the only one left he hadn't asked and so Kyttn had, without much thought about it, packed up her few things and headed back toward RhyDin town and the Outback for one night of duel calling. Robert had been there which shocked her, but she hadn't shown it, hadn't pounced him as much as her heart wanted to. They'd spoken little, but it did her good to see him and she pondered, thinking too much again, if it were some sort of sign. Helping Kelli and Tera with that Friday night's duels had been wonderful - partly because Robert was there and partly because seeing her friend Kelli always cheered her fuzzy little kyttn heart; although, itwas true that Kyttn didn't take it nearly as seriously as she used to. In fact, she'd gotten quite carried away. She loved Tera too, but wasn't sure if she hadn't offended her. There was one point where Tera looked about ready to start throwing bottles. She chuffed softly as she thought about it and shook her head. Tera never seemed to stay annoyed long though, so Kyt wasn't too worried. Besides, Robert had left alone and Kyt had left to go onher way the next morning, also alone.Kyttn had taken to carrying a boot flask she'd found in the Willow and for some reason had filled it with liquor. During the shift she'd watched Robert and he'd watched her - he'd tossed her a quater for the juke - she knew his eyes were on her all that time. It felt very good - warmed her deep inside. Then, as always, he left and she'd fallen into that habit of filling the hole of his missing charisma with flirting and a bit of tequila. As usual,it worked - for a while - but it was hard to forget that man. "After all," Kyt murmured to herself, remembering a ride they'd taken, "there's just something women like about a pick-up man." Being in the Outback always provided her with memories of Strider. Knowing he was gone in a very mortal and permanent way did nothing to allieviate her desire to drink. She wasn't very stable after changing out of her caller's vest and when the place was empty, she left the locker room. She had known that Ashly would be using her place so she'd crashed on the Outback sofa - where she'd spent many a previous night for other reasons - and had leftagain in the morning. She smiled as she watched the flames and scribbled out a note on the PADD about the Brute of that week to Thomas. The lad would be pleased. That done, Kyttn lay back, mulling over missing friends with tails or cowboy hats and where they might be now.

[DoF Archive]

Date: 8/25/1998 2:20 PM Central Daylight Time
From: Kyttn


Casting NetsShe sat down on the high bluff where she'd made her camp that week and tapped out a message to Thomas by connecting to rhydin.net. What surprised her was that Thomas sent her mail back almost immediately and she let out a laugh that echoed across the RhyDin wild country. Rhydin.net was a service provided by the tech wizards of RhyDin (most of them based in and around the tech-oriented cities--like the Spaceport at Star's End--of that mystical land where cultures, times and peoples blended in a Nexus of something beyond the "normal"). This service was based in a small complex just outside the range of the e.l.f.'s put out by the spaceport and all its intergalactic traveling. The complex was called Netvillageand it's main building recieved all net mail at vienna.rhydin.net. Vienna was the name of the president of the rhydin.net corporation. The service allowed RhyDin's more tech oriented citizens to connect to the rss.net and other electronic online services. There were more based across RhyDin, but Kyttn had been using rhydin.net for years--since she'd arrived on this world--and it suited her. She was surprised that Thomas had managed to convince the monks to let him connect to the net and the more she thought about it, she was sure the monks had NOT been the ones to let him. After he'd answered her mail and acknowledged the Brute award he was to get, she sent him a personal message. The PMs could connect two people who were on the net at the same time (you didn't even need to be on rhydin.net for this anymore, the things thatcame out of Netvillage were so wonderfully advanced that you could talk to anyone if they were connected and you had a name for the computer to point to.)Their conversation included a discussion about whether or not Thomas should be talking online or if the Brother's knew about it. Thomas reassured her that they did. Kyttn smiled to herself as she typed, sure the boy was ... taking privileges with the truth. Certainly his spelling didn't reflect having been online a "long" time. The dream she'd had about the fire was vague, but she was sure it indicated the monastery. She mentioned it to Thomas and he reassured her that it was just demons in the mind. Kyttn had heard something, then, in the darkness and forgot all about thms5903@rhydin.net and closed down her PADD to do some "dinner stalking".The dinner stalking Kyttn had engaged in took her far afield from the small camp atop the bluff. It was a week before she returned. She took a moment to read the subject lines of her mail and reviewed only the Brute of the Week listing of recommendations from Rask. It took only a moment of looking before she decided to put it off. Her PADD demanded attention, but she was focused elsewhere. She left camp again before sending any new messages toThomas. Fourteen days. For fourteen days she'd hardly eaten or slept. It was a starkly unkempt Kyttnayah who returned from making her way through a long dark time in the wilderness. It was a woman who had confronted the deepest emptinesses in her soul and come to grips with them. She didn't know it had been so long a time until she regarded the reckoning of information on her small computer. When she finally mustered the interest to look at it, shetapped out the brief message to Thomas about giving the Brute award to first Harl Frickard for the week of the twelfth and then to Colonel Matt Simon for the week of the nineteenth. She knew Matt Simon, at least as well as any of the other regulars in the Outback but while his name registered in her mind his face did not. It was odd since her mind felt startlingly clear about a lot of things that had been hazy before. His winning the award pleased her, but she couldn't see his face or the shape of the buckle she knew that Thomas would hand over to him. She'd been away for months from dueling. Although she had returned theone time to call as a favor to her old boss, she had no desire to lift fist again and climb into the ring. Her email told her that Jake Thrash had been suggested as a potential winner, but Kyttn felt that his mere return to the rings did not merit the title of Brute as strong and sure as he was in the duels. She frowned a moment and realized that she couldn't see Jake's face either. That didn't seem right. She was almost afraid to try to envision the face of Nate, her soulmate, but just the whisper of his name in her mind brought his face to light, vivid as ever. His green eyes, his dark hair, his smooth smile. She released a sigh of pleasure at the image. Kyttn hit send, flashing the names of Frickard and Simon off to Thomas through the ether and sat back to stare at the small screen.

[DoF Archive]

Date: 10/31/1998 2:46 PM Central Daylight Time
From: Kyttn


Catching Answers

The cat's writing was fluid, much like the way she moved, but it was filled with unrepented for errors, unfinished thoughts, and sudden changes of direction. It poured out of her with the sudden urgency of a summer storm...

I don't know when I've seen a sky so blue. It's startling how the sky is wide open here, revealing. If you stare up at it too long it forces you to retreat deep inside.

I've been inside myself for days. If it weren't for my padd I wouldn't know what day it was - Thomas will be upset that I've been so late at reading mail and sending out the awards - but that's not important
that's not now.
Now is --me-- Nate, nature, memories, futures wildness...everything.

The air is so crisp, I can feel it - and every inch of my lungs - as I breathe. I'ts marvelous.

I can't tell ... maybe the jack rabbit was diseased... that might explain why I am charged this way.

I still feel it's blood on my hands the hot blood of life that gives up its own so that I can breathe, love, exist, feel. I doubt it was every like this on Mantiev, but it's funny -- sometimes I cn hardly remember what that was like. Sometimes I can hardly feel my past -- I don't feel it now. I feel full...

full of possibilities ...
expectations
life

full of jackrabbit! There are many of them out here that I have my choice of them. The ones I take are fat and hot when I open them. I slit them with my claws along the belly after I break their necks. The blood is sweet... and they aren't just fat, they are so fat. I don't even have to skin them - I just turn them inside out. I'm neater than most predators, perhaps that is my human associations coming out in me. I bury the remains -
give it back to the ground ... this land takes care of me. It shows me things... I love it here. I try to take care of it. Nate would do that too, I think.

I'm not lonely. I don't know what happened. But the fear of being alone -- of making mistakes, of being in this world by myself -- is gone. I hope every day with my whole heart that I will see Nate again. If I knew how to pray, I would pray for his safe return. It's different now, the way I need him. I was in dispair before - I can live now. When he comes back, he will find me slightly changed -- all for the better. I know he will be back
for me. It's how it must be.

The talk I had with Perky about knowing which path to take helped; the way he listened. I think that must be why his path is that of purity. It isn't an easy path to follow but he does it with grace and warmth and love and kindness. I remember what Robert, Nate's brother, said about how I should solve my problem by going out and having sex. It makes me smile to think of it. I know now that would have replaced one man with another and my heart
wouldn't have found it's own way.

Besides, Percy's an Emerald, just like me. He would have needed to give in. I am glad he wasn't tempted. It's just to easy when humans are tempted.

I don't know if God is - and if he is I don't know if he's resposible for the friends I have - but someone, something, even if it is just *me* needs to be thanked for the friends I have been given.

I think I can make my home here now.

[DoF Archive]

Date: 10/31/1998 3:04 PM Central Daylight Time
From: Kyttn


Seeing the Future

Kyttn had been back a few times to duel in the Outback since her heart had made many revelations about itself. She'd found the dueling wasn't the same as it used to be, and more than that, she wasn't the same. This wasn't where she needed to be. There was only one place she truly needed to be. After she took care of one last thing, she'd go and find her heart's mate and that would be where
she'd remain.

She met up with Eldarion, Strider's son again, spoke to him a while. She discovered on that particular evening that Eld was a firey young man to whom she could easily be attracted were she willing to be so. Kyttn was glad when her friend Kellian Elan's troubles had intruded upon her conversation with Eld. There were things she had learned from Kelli that solidified her need to see the place where Aragorn, son of Arathorn had taken his last stand
in this mortal life.

If it came up in future conversations, she'd determined that night, she'd ask Eld to take her to Gondor. She had the strongest impression that night, however that Eld would not be the one.

Oddly enough, as it happened, it was another young man, Karteran, Eld's friend, who would be the one to make that journey with her.

[DoF Archive]

Date: 11/3/1998 3:09 PM Central Daylight Time
From: Kyttn


Things You Never See ComingKyttn looked up from the small PADD and couldn't seem to hold back the tears. The note from Brother Patrick had been simple, poorly spelled as the friar rarely had opportunity to use the device Kyttn had given to Thomas. The young boy had died, unable to overcome the strain of influenza that had made him ill. If they'd only said something sooner, she thought, I could have found him somemedicine, done something. But they hadn't, and she hadn't asked, so she'd been unable to help. Knowing that didn't stop it from hurting and she wrapped her arms around her knees and cried for the young boy who'd loved the duels and who'd been so honored to hand out the awards. The wind blew over the butte where she sat, running invisible fingers through her mane of hair as if to comfort her. The PADD's cursor blinked silently, waiting. After a time, she read through the other notes and decided to deliver the last Brute buckle she would ever award to Rask himself so that he might pass it on to the deserving winner. There was so much else to do ... other things to take care of for her now. She dropped him a note to let him know of her plans, her resignation from the duel of fists staff and she closed her PADD with a click.

[DoF Archive]

Date: 11/3/1998 5:06 PM Central Daylight Time
From: Kyttn


Voyage Youth teaches us that love is a never ending bond that floats beyond the ability of time and space to capture. That if one gives of his or her heart fully that the intense feelings of passion and desire will never die. That the memories of our loved ones will come unbidden into our mind during great times of averace and pain. These memories will carry us through our darkest moments and allow us to ride free on the wings of hope. It allows usto believe that no matter what the circumstance that it is the creators divine right that we will love so fully during our life times that our souls will have limitless room to ensare this sweet sweet images and encapsulate them till our ending days. It teaches us that there is merit in virtue, in hope, in trust. That if we believe in these things without the bitter saber of despair reaching our hearts then our wildest human dreams can come to lifewithin a fleeting moment of time. Experience teaches us that the dreams of youth are often faulted. That clinging to the dreams that were carved into our young minds often proves to carry a sentence of such unendurable pain that many of us vow to never love again. Experince that rips the trust from our tongues as others false words parade around us like a demented chorus line. Trust is found to be no more stronger then the feather on a swallow and often flys away just asfast. Our hearts become harder our spirits become shielded and the core of love, beauty and honesty is buried within the shell of callous protection that defies others to look within us. The abbrasive crust is our own defiant protection against the constant beleif that we will be wronged again, that we to will fall prey of loves ruthless promise of happiness only to be cruxified on the pillar of want and failed dreams. But even with all its pain, sorrow and broken promises, love was still powerfull enough to give the dying reason to fight on. To sacrfice through unyeilding physical and mental pain so that the light of love could once again rise and be whole. No other emotion in the human condition is, was, or ever will be as strong as the emotion of love. Hatred could keep a man strong, jealousy could wrap around one like a shield, but only love couldproduce the saber to cut through all other defenses and allow its wielder to rise and truimph. These are lofty notions, notions that perhaps do not make sense to all. They are often sensations that defy man or womans ability to communicate. That is why love is produced in song, in dance, in writing, in simple touch, because no matter the condition that is used to convey the message it lacks the consuming power to deliever the message of one persons feelings to another. It is the ability to gaze into a persons spirit and say "Yes" notin lust or physical desire, to look within the eyes of another and feel the confirmation of all that is right and true about yourself. To feel that you can stand in front of another and feel the core of the universe and know that you have found peace. Not faith to a god or graven image can match the faith you feel in that loving bond. The world may be destroyed and your soul with it, but always the spirit of your life, your love and your devotionwill remain. As always... "By heavens you ramble so." The cutting voice of Cheyno raised Nate out of his reverie. The old Indian was gone now, his physical body cast aside and laid to rest. Now all that remained was the inner words of a man who had given his life so that Nate might live. It was comforting to hear the words of his former teacher and instructor. Nate missed the dancing proud figure that had been his company and battle mate for a war that no one wouldever even know exsisted. Sometimes in these dark swampy nights on his journey back to his Wispy Willow home Nate could almost hear the defiant voice of his teacher cry out into the night, providing order to the forest so desperately in need of it. Then there were other times like this when the old bastard's interferance into his thoughts was almost unbearable. Cheyno was indeed gone, his spirit indeed laid to rest, but some part of Nate's inner being kept the old bastard alive for some reason. It was almost as if part of his brain was compensating for the loss his heart could not bear. Still to Nate's reasoning it was the old bugger speaking to him from beyond the grave, sometimesmocking, but always teaching. "Leave me be you old idiot...I am creating." Nate's hands flowed outward as if they were trying to will the creative vibe back into his body and allow the muse to once again overcome him. It had been a long time since he had written anything and it was exceedingly difficult for him to look at any of his own work and make sense of it. He was trying to make some type of universal sense of a gathering of mush that would no doubt be interpretedthe wrong way anyway. History would revile him as a maniac and children would toss stones at him on the street as if he were a leper and... "It is a wonder that both of us did not die on that rock. Luckily you are a better warrior then you are a talker." Nate's frown creased across his lips and twisted his now browner features in a position of true annoyance. He looked at the few scribblings he had made and balled them up and pitched them over his shoulder with not so much as a sigh. He had gotten used to pitching aside his work. He was lucky that many of his enemies had beenvanquished from previous encounters or they would have easily followed his litter trail and cut him to shreds. He had been trying to write for Kyttn for months now. Find some way to communicate with her to let her know that he was still active and functioning. He had not heard word from her or any of his former friends in RhyDin but that was as he chose. He had no intention of returning to the Outback. He had lost all his taste for fighting now. He had been bathed in blood for long enough andnow he could not forsee any cause that would bring him to raise his fist in anger, but then he had swore as much after his sudden departure from the war between the states. There was that same sense of cleansing virtue, almost as if he had been given a chance once more to escape the horrors of death and destruction. Yet still he had marched into yet another struggle, one of his own emotion and the other for the land he loved so much, the only thingthat made any sense to him anymore. "This time I will remain free." He vowed to himself. No longer would he plunge head first into causes carrying his own inner virtue as a standard against what he felt was right and wrong. He would enjoy being neutral and living alone...much like he had wanted to do in years previous. Again the old man's voice sounded in his head "Then why do you write to that silly cat? You know she is a million miles away and more then likely much happier." Nate knew that while the tone rang as Cheyno's it was his own inner voice that wrote the script. The old I

[DoF Archive]

Date: 4/9/1999 5:53 PM Central Daylight Time
From: Kyttn


Starting Out On A Journey
… last year after quitting as a ref …


Kyttn, dressed in torn gray sweat pants and a white ribbed tank top beneath a denim jacket, padded into the Outback. To her dismay, she’d found the door left open. This disturbing discovery never the less stirred the hope within her that lockers were shut and weapons properly stored. Despite the remains of a few shattered bottles on the far side of the Outback, everything seemed intact. The bottles didn’t surprise her. After all, she smiled to
herself, ever since Percy had stopped coordinating the cleaning, the place was a mess. She was quiet as usual, her eyes glowing with bioluminescence in the lack of light. Then, the pungent odor of alcohol blended with pipe smoke drifted over her nostrils and she hesitated. Her ears twisted forward and rotated back as she moved toward one of the practice mats dropping her knapsack. She heard the swish and "bloop" of alcohol in a bottle as it was
tipped back and call out, "Who’s there?"

He sat in perhaps the furthest corner of the dark, wood and brass acquitted Outback...almost invisible in the shadows. His eyes were cast toward one of the windows; and even though he looked outside he saw nothing. His only movement was displayed when he lifted a bottle containing a liquor of sorts to his lips. Also ... a pipe hung limply out of the corner of his mouth, occasionally clicking against the bottle when he drank. A thin wisp of smoke
gently flowed out of its end, the tobacco burning itself out with each successive swallow. His eyes never strayed from the window ... as he looked meticulously at everything yet saw nothing.

Always a gregarious and talkative sort when it came to meeting new people, Kyt continued. "I don't know your scent." While awaiting his answer, almost hoping that somehow the scent was mangled by the booze and the man was Robert, she dropped to the mat and spread her legs out for stretching. Her ears were angled toward him still to judge if he were friend or foe. And although she had a strong feeling it was someone who'd rather not be troubled,
she wasn't about to change her evening's plans.

There was no immediate answer. She became aware of his cold, blue eyes focused on the window. Her attentive ears picked up yet another swig from the bottle in his hand.

"Cheery fellow, eh?" She chuffed softly, amused by her own comment. "I bet your liver just loves you." She tugged her feet in toward one another and slowly bent forward until her forehead touched the mat. Her long tail twitched at the tip, just slightly, as it lay out to the side of her, thick at it’s base and narrowing some at the jittery tip. She turned her head to one side to keep a watch on him as she stretched. He wore only shorts and a cut
off shirt despite the chill in the air.

Finally his glassy eyes came out of their daydream daze and focused slightly on the newcomer to his quiet world. He looked at her as if trying to assess something. He was bleary eyed and drunk and his eyes couldn’t clearly distinguish who or what she was. After a moment of just staring, uncaring, almost lazily, he took another swig, then spoke in a low, raspy, almost dead tone, and told her what she could do with herself and her time.

She let out a warm, low chuff of sound. That word – whether in anger or passion always made her smile. "Definitely a pleasant fellow. Tell me, do you duel here or just take your life in your glass on Jake's black ale?" She rolled back, her smooth body arching as she proceeded to complete several other stretches. She watched him all the while.

"Actually, its Brandy-wine Ale...somthin' ya would kno' nothin' 'bout. An' yes I duel 'ere from time ta time... wha' th' 'ell is it ta ya?"

She sat up and addressed him. "I know quite a bit about Brandy-wine Ale, my gloomy friend. Strider used to lend me his glass on occasion... or I've had opportunity to taste it from his own lips, so mind your manners. I thought only to ask if you liked to duel - if so, you might give me a round or two of practice
in the ring."

Raising a brow, the stranger said, "Strider, eh?" He nodded slightly. "Yeah, heard he was kinda famous 'round 'ere... 'fore this place wen' ta 'ell." ::chuckles:: "An' I don' think ya wanna duel me, girly."

"This place hasn't gone to hell. Only the people in it unwilling to fight to make it better assume that.. then they sorta drift away… never to be heard from again." She laughed softly. "Are you one of the Opals then, that you might win so easily?"

He stood, warily at first, almost losing his grip on the bottle ... but then moving with more confidence as time progressed. He slowly made his way over toward the voice. "I'm no Opal. They break too easily..."

Kyttn couldn’t help it; she snorted at the mention of Opals breaking. She’d heard a tale of where the Opals had come from and she knew the manling who’d delivered them to the Fists managers. She had faith in the fundamental goodness of that orc and therefore in the stamina of the Opal gems he’s given over. She might not like things of power, nor find them wielded with much sense by humans in general, but she didn’t despise them as Janella seemed
to; nor fear them as others might.

"'ey...Shannon prov'd to us all tha' they are breakabl'..." The man let out a slight sound of humor; but it died quickly as the name "Shannon" came out like a curse.

"Shanni has a temper... it's sad to see her add to the abuse a sport she so loved once rather than nurse it back to health. Some folks don't have the strength for those things, however, and I don't blame her for that."

"I'm jus' no' in the best frame o mind." Whether to discuss the Opals, to talk at all or to discuss Shannon, the man wasn’t clear, so Kyttn took it to mean all of the above.

"Nor in the best of balance, I see," she said, regarding him with an almost mothering eye. "Perhaps standing wasn't wise....?"

"Do no' fret 'bout me...this cat may be drunk 'nough...but he's still got teeth an' claws." His eyes flashed slightly ... and somehow there was an odd familiarity in that for the feline. For a moment it had her attention – as though she ought to know why that happened – but then she reacted to what he said, rather than how he looked.

"Cat?" Kyt’s ears perked up and she wondered if she were looking at something, someone, who wasn’t all he appeared to be. She’d heard and seen werewolves, and other fantastical beasts that could change form – why some considered Kyttn herself to be more than just a genetic blend; though, she wasn’t.

She made a low, guttural sound in the back of her throat. "And what do you know about ... cats?" It was not –quite-- asked in the same tone as his question about Brandy-wine Ale.

"Tha' me fath'r screwed one when he was still alive." His words though crude were not meant to be harsh, nor gentle ... just a simple statement of fact.

Her ears rotated forward and she stilled completely. "Excuse me?"

He paused. "No' blood father, mind you. He sort of ... adopted me."

Her eyes were wide, black, circles in the dark, glowing when the position was right, surrounded by thin circlets of royal blue. "So you're not saying you're part feline?" She said it with an unconsciously held breath.

"No. I'm full elf ... no feline here. No' ta shatter yer hopes or anything."

Her soft exhale was hardly noticed. "Ah … then what was that about your father? Or rather, your adopted father?"

"Well ... Aragorn said ta me an' Eld once tha' he had a close relationship with a humanoid feline." He had moved to the ring and climbed within as he spoke, and now he leaned against the ropes.

Her own mild, faintly inhuman laughter, issued forth as she rose to her feet. "And did Aragorn use the word screwed...?" She was vastly amused by that thought as she slipped through the ropes to do some stretches involving them.

The man let out his own roar of laughter there. It wasn’t at all the way she’d heard Lirenel laugh, and he was part elfin; nor, was it human sounding. The man before her laughed in a way that sounded hard, dark and violent. "No," he told her. "He was no' one ta say words o such like ‘less he was really pissed off. Like me." The grin which the laughter subdued itself into was not necessarily a good, friendly smile. There even might have been a
sinister edge to it.

"No he wasn't..." Kyttn performed a deep knee bend, asking on the upswing after a slight pause, "So you're pissed off about something then?"

He offered a bobbing, slightly drunken nod. "Yup."

"I see. So your plan is to drink yourself into a stupor so that you don't have to deal with the anger."

"I'm no' one ta giv' in ta anger...

"No? That’s good because it will give you an ulcer if you hold it inside."

"Strider taught me better than that."

"Did he? I can believe it. Strider..." she smiled. "I don't believe Strider ever managed to stay angry at anyone in his life."

"’Cept one. Or maybe ya didn' kno' 'im as well as ya let on.."

She stared at him then, and a soft growl escaped her lips. "Even that one he went back to. And that was..." She shook her head as if surrendering and turned aside to slide back out from between the ropes.

"A mistake?"

"Foolish," she spit. "Foolish of us both... " She walked back to her pack and tossed it over her shoulder. "I could have stopped it.. should have..." She muttered, "stupid," and her long tail swayed side to side in aggravation.

The man smiled then, but slightly. "Forgive me, Kyttnayah o’ Mantiev. There are too many feline people walkin’ round ... can't make heads or tails o’ them."

"No need to be sorry for that or anything else."

"Yer no' leavin' are ya?" There was something in his voice that could have been disappointment. Kyttn at least, chose to see it that way. She took a deep breath through her nose.

"That would be doubly foolish, aye? You must know Eldarion if you are an adopted son of Aragorn. What's your name?" She dropped her pack again and held out a ... paw.

He grinned, apparently relieved. "Karteran." He took her hand … er … paw in his and shook it warmly. Her fingers were curled in making it feel more like a paw than a hand at that moment. He knew as well as she that she did it for effect, she could see it in his eyes.

"It's good to meet you."

He bowed in a very knightly manner, a Gondoresque sort of motion. "Th' pleasure is mine, m'lady."

Kyttn smiled privately at his courtliness, and held that to herself. It was something of a remembrance of Strider. Though the bow was not as graceful as Strider's would it have been, it was near enough and made Kyttn wonder if the younger man had worked and lived in the palace where she’d always envisioned Strider ruling. Perhaps he’d been a king’s guard? Romantic notions of what it was like there flickered only momentarily in her head as he
continued speaking to her.

"An' yes, I know Eld...quite well...tho I 'av no' seen 'im fer some time... mixed up with som' woman..."

"That's generally the way around these parts. You disapprove?"

He smiled. "I 'av no' 'ad th' greates' luck with women as o late. So, naturally, women ar' nay on my highest list."

"Well, they're not all bad.. but when they are, they are deadly."

"’Hell hath no fury as a woman's wrath’... Strange tha' I should say tha' now...considerin' he us'd it ta describe th' person who caused my ... distemper."

She flicked her tail side to side, her hand still trapped in his. "That’s a nice choice of words."

"Gondor’s trainin' at its finest, m'lady." Karteran was now standing upright much like a knight of genuine training ... apparently he wasn't as drunk as he’d let on.

"Were you around them both for very long, Karteran?"

"I was with Strider for a short time...but in tha' time he chang'd me life..." He was quiet a moment, and she could tell that memories were drifting through his mind as well.

"He had a way of doing that." She said quietly, withdrawing her hand from his.

Karteran grinned broadly as he faced her, as though pleasant memories of his adoptive father were all he had. Somehow, she knew that was far from true. . "Ay'...tha' he did, didn't he? I was livin' with her, bu' now I guess I'm back ta livin' in Eld's home...tha' was once Strider's home." This seemed to say he would be again closer to the man who was long dead now. Kyttn wasn’t sure who he meant at first when he said he lived with
her.

"So, he'd not be pleased that you sit in the shadows and drink, don't you agree?" Then she shuddered, and wanted to clarify who he meant. "Why did you live .. with her?"

His dark shadowed eyes glanced down, pondering the question. "Considerin' th' circumstances, I dunno..." he shrugged. "I lov'd her. But even tha' doesn't make up fer things, eh?"

"What circumstances?"

"Well... I believe when Strider found out 'bout his wife, who shall remain nameless, he was none too happy, eh?"

Kyttn blinked, confused a moment, then raised a hand. "Forgive me.. I know these things are personal."

"Well... I am in a similar circumstance."

She tried to make sense of that. "I'm not one to stop asking questions... but I see your point." Or she thought she did. "And I apologize if delving too deeply has hurt you any."

He shook his head. "I'd rath'r talk 'bout it, actually...if'n ya don't mind listenin."

She reached out, near the mat after all, and took his hand again. She tugged as she moved down to sit on the cushioned floor. "I'm all ears." And she rotated them, just to prove it.

He sat down beside her. "Well... I kno’ ya kno' o’ one called Shannon Colton."

"Yes," Kyttn offered a half smile. They’d already covered some ground on Shanni where they’d found themselves to disagree. Kyttn decided that to distinguish between her feelings for Shanni and her opinions about Shanni’s actions would be a good idea. "She was the first fight I ever had here in the Outback.. my first win too... She taught me a great deal about something I have enjoyed and while we disagreed, I think we were friends."

"Well...she was me first 'win' 'ere too...an' me ultimate loss."

The realization hit Kyt that Shanni hadn’t just given up relationships after all and she said, "I have never thought of Shanni as a heart breaker- but everyone has their surprises.... "

"Indeed."

The gentle touch of her hand was on his forearm for a fleeting moment of contact. "What happened?"

Karteran made no outward sign, nor did Kyttn, but there was a slight tingle of an electric shock through that brief touch. "I was with 'er for four months...up until she lost 'er child. Then, I guess I became too much ta deal with."

Questions darted through the felinoid’s mind and eyes. "Didn't even know she was... stones, how awful for her... Four months.. then you were... the father?" Kyttn’s eyes were infinitely gentle. She’d known other men who’d lost children and it seemed to affect them far more than they’d ever let on. "This is your loss too?"

He shook his head slightly. "No ... well, yes, it is a great loss for me. But the child was not mine."

"Not yours..." Her brows drew together and for a moment, she thought the worst in a very human, very unKyttn fashion.

"The child was conceived before I was a part o’ Shannon's life."

"Ah. Then she wasn't unfaithful... "

"No. Well...as far as I kno'..." He shook his head after a moment’s thought. "No...she wasn't... I would have felt that."

"But .." and she paused before saying the dreaded name of Strider’s wife. "Elessar was, wasn't she? I'm not sure I understand the comparison of circumstances."

"Yes Elessar was... Although Eld was conceived before the unfaithfulness. In both situations, tho...the woman left the man. That is why I said it was similar."

"I'm sorry, Kart. Was she just unable to endure past the tragedy?"

"Nothin' ta apologise for, although I appreciate the sympathy.... I guess tha's what it was... I mean, it was hard for me too... And I tried, god damn did I try, to help her out in every...any way... and everything I did wasn't enough."

"I know you loved her... perhaps love her still. Forgive me for saying this - but I'm not sure anything anyone could have done would have been enough. The only man I ever knew who could get through to her was Tao. And for that matter, I’m not even sure he was a corporeal man."

Kart nodded. "Ay'...her teacher...well, she said Strider 'elped her out many times...but I think yer right... Tao's the only one tha' could really get through to her. I think Tao is more of a presence than a sex." He shrugged. Neither of them knew or ever would know. Kyttn had heard that Tao had died not all that long ago.

"Yeah, Energy ... Something."

"An' as far as lovin' her...tha' stopped fer me when she did."

Kyt twisted her head to one side. "How do humans ... forgive me again, elves... how is that done?"

"How is wha' done?"

"How do you stop loving someone? It is something that has been beyond my ability to do."

"Well...I still care fer her...an' wish th' best fer her...but I no long'r *love* her."

"The circumstances change for me.. but the emotions.. .they never do. If I think on someone I have loved long enough, the same deep feelings emerge and the love is there."

"I 'av a question... Did you love Elessar when she was Aragorn's wife? When the two really felt love for one another?"

"No, but I wouldn’t say I ever knew her well enough to have loved her. Should I have?"

"Well, wha' did ya feel towards her when she married Aragorn? Before th' corruption set in..."

"I barely knew her.. but he was happy to marry her and he was my friend and so I thought of her as a friend."

"So...ya don' luv' yer friends?"

"Perhaps I should have said "acquaintance". I dearly love Kellian and Stof. And Robert and Ian and Tis and Matt…"

"In either way...your emotions towards her were different then than they are now, yes?"

"Yes. What I was saying however is that those whom I have loved, I have never ceased to love."

"Ahhh...forgiv' me, m'lady...I though' ya said tha' yer circumstances change...but yer emotions don't..."

"Aye.. the circumstances change.. for example.. I loved Rand greatly... before Strider... yet Rand married... so the circumstance and our relationship- how we expressed it-- changed.. but my love for him is with me to this day."

He nodded. "I see wha' ya mean..."

"So how do you turn that off... how do you find that switch.. or would it be more accurate to say.. that perhaps the love was never there in the first place?" Kyttn’s curiosity was fully into the questioning and when that happened she tended to be blunt and probing when she ought to be sensitive and caring, but Karteran, her new acquaintance, didn’t seem to mind.

"I think tha' th' word ya use...love...is care in my terminology. Okay...now, Aragorn loved Elessar once very much...would you expect him to still love her in any way?"

"Can they be divided? Care and Love? I .. do not think his love or his hope ever died. If he were alive today despite all she's done and she came to him and said, again, ‘forgive me, I love you...’ I must say I think he would find a way to tap into that love and let it flow. He was that kind of man. Which in part is why I believe he wound up dead."

Karteran thought for a second only. "I think th' only reason he could ever love her lives now. And his name is Eld."

"A strong reason, there is no denying." They were both silent for a long time, each with their own thoughts and then Karteran stood and extended his hand.

"Well, care ta 'av a go?" He didn’t say that he meant a go at dueling; in fact, he deliberately left his meaning wide open.

Smiling, Kyttn took his hand and let him assist her to her feet. "I'd like that," she said and stepped into the ring.

((tbc…))

[DoF Archive]

Date: 4/15/1999 3:20 PM Central Daylight Time
From: Kyttn


A Soothing Smoke ... ?

Kart was sitting by a tree, leaning against it actually, shirtless and smoking a pipe. He was in a part of the wood a few acres behind the cabin he shared with Eldarion. A packed satchel of sorts rested to his side. His hair was tied back, albeit loosely. Anduril, the sword of his friend, rested against the tree trunk as well. His eyes weren't shut ... but somehow his thoughts seemed preoccupied. In part, he was wondering if Kyttnayah had even
gotten the message to meet him here. He seemed to be regarding a treeless hillock a slight distance away. A faint humming filled the air, insidiously, as if he were mumbling sung words of old from a time and past almost forgotten but for him.

The felinoid moved through the trees, silent, as always, looking for where he'd said to meet him. Karteran was an interesting young man. He and Kyttn had, since their first meeting and duel taken to meeting late at night or early in the afternoon when the Outback was empty to spar one another. It was a way to keep in shape, to vent frustrations unrelated to one another and a way to avoid having to talk to their mutual acquaintances about their
mutual losses. Kyttn had been intrigued by the note he had left for her there one afternoon. She was curious, as always, and willing to find out what it was about - even though she had already decided to ask him something about another old friend all on her own. It never occurred to her that Kart's reason for the meeting, and the questions she had were all about the same thing.

She recognized the terrain not long after she'd started out on her short journey and each step brought back memories she was surprised to find made her heart quicken and her breathing tremble. "Some things just slip away," she murmured in a purr to herself, "without ever coming back."

The faint aroma of pipe smoke was perhaps the only odor unexpected in this otherwise peaceful and usual setting. Maybe he was just trying to calm otherwise unsettled nerves with the pipe ... maybe he's trying to help someone find a way to this meeting place ... maybe a little of both.

"... and others never do." She shook her head, and moving on, her nostrils picked up the drift of smoke. It was a blend a shade different perhaps from what Strider used to smoke but it put her in the mind of him. As she drew more near, she called out his name softly. The scent of the smoke mixed with the flora and fauna grew more precise and she thought it so similar to Strider's that it must have been made by the same hands, if not from
identical leaves. "Karteran?" Her voice purred on the morning air, carrying in the fall crispness of the day.

He stretched slightly, finally coming out of that trance he seemed to be in, and cracked his back against the tree. Thank god for small favors. "O'er 'ere," he breathed, in more of a whisper than a call. And why was he whispering? Perhaps it was just the mood of the day.

She saw him through the trees and ahh'd in her mind, smiling as she circled a bole and ducked a bough to reach him. He didn't move. His head was still pointed in regard of that hillock. His pipe was still being worked to the fullest extent. Kyttn came to stand before him, although not blocking his vision. She watched him a moment, and settled her small hands on her shapely hips.

Finally, he shifted his gaze from the hillock, and looked at her. He offered up the sacrifice of a slight grin to her on the alter of their budding friendship. But still, the look on his face was mixed with eagerness, slight fatigue, and perhaps even worry.

She curled her tail around her calves in the cool morning and squatted down, her forearms resting on the worn, specially "tail-ored" blue-jeaned thighs. "So," she said softly, "What's on your mind, my friend?"

"Th' past...memories...old friends long gone." He gave a nod to replace the grin. "I'm glad ya came...wasn't sure ya'd trust th' note."

Bringing her hands up, she flipped up the collar of her cotton button-down shirt. Then she absently flicked her auburn mane of hair so that it rested normally again, over the collar. "That's an occasionally gloomy place for thoughts to be, Kart. As to the note.." She shrugged. "I don't have many enemies."

"One tends ta make enemies in this place whether they like it or no. Anyways,"...more of a grunt than a word... "the reason I ask'd ya ta come 'ere has ta do with an old friend o yers. An' mine as well." He stood and stretched again up to his full height. He was a slight bit taller even than Strider had been. The pipe jutted out of the corner of his mouth. "I've been thinkin' o Aragorn much recently...an' I 'av a feelin' ya 'av been too. Eld
told me tha' ya were th' closes' friend...may'ap th' only friend...tha' Strider 'ad in this place..."

"I think he had one or two others... but .. I loved him a lot." Kyttn's eyes softened. Friend, father, lover, the man had been many things.

"Ay' ... an' did I as well ... Tha's why I ask'd ye an' only ye ta accompany me."

"I have been thinking of him. Ever since seeing Eldarion again." She blinked, then realized that from two vastly different places in the scheme of their lives they'd come to this one similar point together. "I want to know where he's... resting."

"I 'ad a feelin'...th' old man 'as a way o stickin' in yer mind sometimes." He smiled tightly. It was a dark laugh that followed, but that was just how he laughed these days. Kyt had grown used to it. "Ay'...I ne'er 'ad a chance ta pay me respects ta 'im...an' I know tha' ya didn't 'av th' chance either. Eld would 'av been yer guide ta see 'im...but there were a few reasons he opt'd not ta come."

Surprised, she lifted her brows and said, "You talked it over with him?" His nod brought out a small smile on her dark lips. She thought about that seemingly coincidental turn of events and her luminous blue eyes caught the light a moment, thoughts racing along distant memories as quickly as they returned to the present when he spoke. "I confess to some disappointment. But I guess I can understand why he wouldn't want to go back."

Kart coughed a soft laugh. "Ay' tha' was one reason..." he said. But there was another...one he felt tha' would be best left unmentioned... Cait wouldn't like tha' too much, would she? "Ay'...tis 'ard fer 'im jus' livin' with it," he said at last. "So...I 'ope ya don' mind settlin' fer me as a travelin' companion."

"Settling? I don't think I'm settling at all, babe." Kyttn smiled, her sharp teeth showing in the full, inhumanly felinoid smile she reserved for those she trusted. It was a ferocious look, but it was gleeful too and let out all of the emotion in her that backed up her words. It would be no hardship traveling with Karteran.

He smiled back, a rare sight indeed. Damn, he'd found it so hard to trust any woman lately. Why, he wondered, did he find himself already trusting this one? Then his smile faded, and that dark beacon that he tried always to hold back, but sometimes surfaced no matter what, appeared "I mus' giv' ya a warnin' tho, m'lady." Kyttn tilted her head, her eyes on him, waiting. "When we go ... we will no' be th' only ones aware of our
presence on me homeworld." As he said that, almost sub-consciously he lifted Anduril and slid it into its scabbard at his side.

Kyttn followed the action of the sword, the blade catching the daylight until it was hidden in it's sheath. She remembered the evil woman who had drawn Strider back ultimately to his own demise. "So you're saying there won't be any red carpet welcomes for us?"

Kart, caught off guard by his own seriousness perhaps, laughed a genuine, warm laugh void of darkness. "I think no'. Were ya expectin' one?"

She grinned a feral grin and shook her head. "No I wasn't. It's just as well," she shrugged. "I was never one to stand on ceremony."

A breeze toyed with a tendril of his hair until it freed it from the loose tieback. His laugh had faded quickly to a simple smile and then that slipped away. In his eyes was something different. A ceremony of sorts recalled: the last experience he had on his homeworld.

"We'll go in.. do what we need to do.. and come home, agreed?" She made it sound so wondrously simple.

"No...I don' care fer ceremonies either," he nodded. "Agreed, m'lady."

She saw the look that said there was pain there and she knitted her brows together. She asked bluntly, "What happened to you there, Kart, after Aragorn was .. murdered."

"Well... Eld left ta cope with himself...which I blame 'im no' fer...an' I stay'd behind ta take care o th' kingdom even though Asteroth was king. Eld want'd me ta finish me trainin' so I could keep an eye on 'im...although I fear it was too little too late."

"How old were You at that time?"

"I was a little older than Eld."

Just kids, she thought. The whole of what Elessar had done enraged her, but she hid it well. "Perfectly timed by ..." and Kyt paused ever so slightly, waving a hand so that she need not mention Elessar's name. "... I'm guessing?"

"Ay'...an' she'll be waitin' fer us, Kyttnayah. We'll hafta watch fer 'er at all times..." He rested a hand on the hilt of Anduril. "Eld lent me this in case we happ'n ta run across 'er."

Kyttn's brows furrowed more deeply. "I just don't understand that. Why should it matter to her that we're in and out?"

He sighed slightly, his face troubled as if it pains him just to talk about it ... but pain never stops him from speaking about something. "Cause I was banish'd ... an' banishment means ne'er ta return...no matt'r th' reasons. E'en if'n we are in an' out. Also...it giv's 'er a reason ta give me trouble...aft'r all...I sav'd 'er failure-of-a-son's life when she tri'd ta kill 'im like 'is fath'r."

"She catches you.. something worse happens?" It wasn't really a question. Kyttn's arms crossed before her chest.

A straight, cold look answered her; Kart's eyes suddenly cold blue. "I won't get caugh But if'n it happ'ns...ay'...somethin' worse."

"Then.. tell me how to go alone."

"No. I 'av every right ta see 'im as ya do...an' I wan' ta see 'im jus' as much...if if no' more than ye, Kyttnayah." They talked of Strider as if he were alive not buried somewhere. Which, in part, was why they both wanted to make the trip.

She'd expected him to say that he would go either way. But she'd also had to say what she had said. "I didn't mean to offend you, Kart. I'm thinking in part of Eld." Her royal blue eyes glittered. "You're family to him. He needs you more than he needs me."

"I appreciate ya tryin' ta protect us, m'lady...dinnae think tha' I don't... I jus'.... I need this." It was simply said, and easily understood.

She stepped forward in the fallen leaves. One small hand - so small it was hard to believe she was an Emerald in the duel of fists - reached out and rested on his broad shoulder. Her eyes studied her face a long time before she said, "I know."

He looked back at her for a full minute then softly broke the silence. "Well...when yer ready, m'lady."

"I just need my pack and we can leave today. Have you eaten?" She asked, leaning back again against the tree.

"Eh?...oh no...haven't been thinkin' much 'bout food lately."

"How long is this trip anyway.. I've never been to Gondor."

"No' far," he told her and pointed toward the hill not far away. "Ya see tha' hillock on yonder?" Kyt nodded, following the line of sight his finger presented. "Beyond tha' hill, on th' oth'r side...is a doorway o sorts..."

"That close?" A strange shiver drifted along her spine. "All this time," she whispered.

"Ya 'ear tha' hummin'?"

Kyttn focused her ears and nodded again. At first, she assumed that it was Kart humming...but the whole
time it was something different...a warbling of sorts. It was not necessarily pleasant either, somewhat chilling. Her ears continuously drifted back and forth, but for a moment she did what cats do with two specialized sources of hearing and triangulated. It was like the sound a woodsman's saw makes when it is shaken back and forth. Chilling, soft and almost enticing, the sound was muted ... as if it was coming from underground.

Indeed, she had wondered how he was humming and talking at the same time for a while, but the conversation had taken her attention from it until now. "This is the sound of the door?" Her tone was hushed, as though someone might hear.

"Yes It isn't necessarily a door...but tha' word suits our purposes."

The thought of getting closer to that sound didn't thrill her, but it was what she had chosen already to do. She nodded as to herself and said, "What'll we need as far as supplies?"

"I've got e'erything we need, far as food an' campin' needs...if'n ya care fer a change o clothes...I got one set fer ya, bu' tha's it... if'n ya need more...we can get it before we set off."

She vaguely remembered some sort of way bread she'd heard of at one time made by his people... but since he said he was prepared she didn't mention it. "I don't carry many with me when traveling and I've been on the trail a lot lately, so the timing is just right for me. In fact.. I left my pack at the outback.. so a stop there will get me all I need."

"Very well...care fer a bit ta eat before we set off?"

She'd asked him the very question in another form only a bit ago and smiled. "Yes.. it's morning.. and I'm a very hungry Kyttn."

"Well....'ow 'bout we eat...make a quick trip ta th' outback...then continue with our journey sound good?"

She gave a firm nod. "Sounds like a plan." She watched him as he yet stood there and reached for his arm. "C'mon.. my treat."

"Ack," he said, surprised. In most cases, he would have spun and slammed the person responsible for laying hands on him. But in this case he let her take him to where ever was on her mind. But why? Why was she different? Was it because of her look? Or because of her relationship with him in the ring and all the talking they'd done as a result of all the fighting? Or because of her relationship with his father? Or maybe because she was just
one of the only two who gave a damn about him anymore...

"Where are we goin' m'lady?" He asked belatedly.

She adjusted her grip on his arm, sliding her hand around his elbow to rest on his forearm. "I know this little place... Munro's Deli? You can get almost anything you want there..." She spread her free hand out, fingers splayed, indicating the vastness of the Munro deli counter. "Eggs.. bacon... a good breakfast. Because I know the chef," she chuckled. "And I can get meat."

"Anythin' ya wan' eh?" Already he was letting her hold him ... even if it was just his forearm...but damn! That was the closest he'd let anyone get since...well, yeah...since that.... "Munro, eh?...wouldn't happ'n ta 'av any relation ta one Caitlyn Munro would it?"

"I know Ian," she said matter-of-factly. "But I haven't met Cait."

"Oh? ... well..." He let out a funny little chuckle. "She's mov'd in with Eld."

"I don't think she has much to do with the deli if they are related. I've met Ashly, Ian's girl. She's apartment sitting for me, in fact." Kyttn strolled along with him through the trees. Her hand perched as easy as you please on his arm and her tail occasionally brushed the backs of his legs.

"I dunno if'n Cait...an'...Ian? are related...don' kno' tha' one well...bu' they do both 'av th' same last name...so I figur'd..."

"Makes sense.. you'll have to ask her." Kyttn chuffed softly. "Tell me, Kart.. did Cait's moving in with Eld have anything to do with your apparently sudden desire to go back to Gondor?" She shifted her eyes to look at him, not wanting to pry, but curious about this man she'd be traveling with for Gods knew how long.

Walking along, he tried to slow his broad steps so she didn't have to rush. He answered. "I dunno ... it wasn't really her ... jus' th' situation ... I mean ... I dinna 'av th' greates' affection towards women aft'r me an Shannon's end...so naturally I felt both envy an' ang'r towards Cait...ang'r cause I fear'd she may do th' same to Eld tha' Shannon did to me ... and envy cause Eld was spendin' all his time with her ... An' I was also envious o
wha' th' two 'av ... I mean ... they really luv each oth'r ...as far as I can tell ...an' I guess since I dinna av' tha' ... I was envious. I figur'd it'd be best fer both parties ta leav' things be, an' let th' two alone fer a while."

Her hand tighted reflexively on his forearm for a few moments she didn't know quite what to say as they walked, the leaves of early fall crunching under their booted feet. "I've chased someone off from their home once.. or felt as if I had." She said at last, and smiled contritely.

"Oh?" He turned his head to regard her, his blue eyes much softer than before.

"When I moved in with Nate - who's off somewhere preserving the land," she said, smiling indulgently, "it was his brother Robert who had to leave a while. He'd been married and his wife left him. He wasn't comfortable there with me in the house."

"Ay'," he said, understanding. "Cait seems ... well ... bu' I dunna ... it's jus' tha' ... I jus' feel tha' way 'round almost every woman right now." He scratched his head, puzzled about something.

They came down along the hill that led into the seedier part of RhyDin town, off the mainstream where the marketplace was, past the Outback, not far from the small church in the wood where Percy the knight had introduced Kyttn to young Thomas and where some of the locals tended to gather after dark. As it was daylight.. hardly anyone was about. Kart tended to his pipe while walking beside her. She noted that it was a rather dexterious deed. His
hands had to shuffle tobacco, fill the pipe slowly and pack it...then light it. Impressed she watched until he had smoke curling upward toward the sky. Then she asked out of nowhere, "Why do men who tend to hang out in the woods smoke?"

"Hmmm...well...I dunna...jus' giv's us somethin' ta do I guess...pass's th' time."

Kyt knew it was a bit of a walk into RhyDin proper from Kart's hillock. The Deli was in the Marketplace, not very far from Thrash's Red Orc Brewery. They had time for small talk. "I've always wondered." She smiled up at him, then shook back her unruly auburn mane.

He thought about it some more and said, "I lik' th' taste an' smell....an feel o it too, m'lady. I guess it 'as somethin' ta do with Strider doin' it too...somethin' tha' I guess brings me clos'r ta 'im fer some reason."

"The feel? The feel of the pipe in your mouth or the feel of the tabacco?"

"Th' feel o th' smoke...I dunna...it sounds strange...bu' feels right...like 'ow th' smoke jus' rolls off o yer tounge an' mouth...like this," he stopped where they were, sunlight dappling down through the branches, and pulled on the pipe. He exhaled a few nicely made circles of the smoke -- very Aragornesque. Kyt stopped with him and watched, her soft ears angled forward and her eyes focused. The rings had always amazed her. Kart offerered up a
grin at his creation. "Smoke is somethin' ya can always rely on ta satisify ya as well...er... well...no' in tha' way...but in a relaxing way..." He took another pull, and shot a stream of smoke through the middle of one of the disappearing circles.

For a moment she blinked, having been focused on the smoke rings and said, "What?" in response to the 'satisfying' comment. Then she paused, looked at him and a flush of color gathered on her cheeks under her fur. It was almost invisible, but in the morning sun, the color was all too evident even among the downy auburn hairs of her cheeks.

He laughed a little more ... not at her, but from the same feelings. He held out the pipe. "Ya care ta try ...I kno' no' many women do...but I figur'd why no' be polite...an' ask 'er...?"

She laughed and reached up, thinking about it, then shook her head. "I tried a cigar once.. I don't think smoke and I agree.'

"Aw. It is nothin' like a cigar." He wrinkled up his nose slightly and looked around for a moment...quite a comical look. "'specially in a place like this ya can't get a good crop. Th' tobacco from Gondor is very smooth...an' pleasant... Come ta think o it, I don' e'en like th' smell o cigars."

She considered again; looked from his face to where he held the pipe and folded. "Okay.. what do I do.. just breathe in?"

"Pull in a few quick puffs...and don't necessarily inhale it at first...jus' get it goin'... Like this." He showed her how as he pulled on it, and the smoke immediately left his mouth instead of taking a trip to his lungs. "Then after ya get it goin'...take a longer pull an' inhale...ta savor it... Don' inhale too much...it's no' harsh at all...but it can get ya if'n ya take down too much." Cautiously, he passed over the pipe to her.

She took it gingerly. The bowl was clearly still warm from his recent lighting. She wrapped her thin dark lips around the pipe stem, balancing the bowl in her clawed fingers. She had never done this in the whole of the time she'd known Strider but doing it now, here, had her finding it somewhat exciting. She tried to puff.. vaguely remembering an old man in the inn who used to puff-puff almost constantly in an evening.

Kart had folded his arms and was looking on at her and grinning. She smiled at him while trying to puff. Damn, if he had emerald eyes, and a shade wider face and eyes ... he'd pass for Strider despite being an adopted son. Distracted, she pulled too much... swallowed some.. then looked faintly green. She struggled for a deep breath of air for a moment.

His face went from an expression of enjoyment to one of worry. He gently patted her back while moving to stand close beside her. He slipped his other arm around her as she began to cough. "Ya OK, m'lady? That's right...breathe." The whole time he was trying to keep from laughing.

"I'm..." she coughed hard, "fine... heh..." She coughed again but was unwilling to give up. She tried to repeat the process, determined to taste the leaf of Gondor.

"I guess it does take some gettin' used ta." He said, watching, having never even considered the fact of combining a cat and a pipe beyond the concept of it.

Her soft puffs were finally rewarded with a glow in the bowl and then the ability to take a longer puff. Sadly, she mistakenly swallowed half of it again. And, for a second time it was as bad as the first. The smoke rather billowed up around her nose and eyes as it left her mouth and she coughed again, to comment between gasps, "You do this for fun?"

"Er....maybe ya should let me handl' it..." Kyttn's overlarge eyes blinked several times as he spoke, but she handed back the pipe with no further argument. "Ya kno' yer no' suppos'd ta swallow it tho, m'lady...jus' inhale it... As if ya were breathin' air."

Her hands free, one slipped over her stomach and just stayed there. She smiled a bit of a twisted smile. "I wasn't trying to swallow it," she said, then chuffed low and somewhat dangerously. "I just happen to be good at that."

She had to say that in the process of his taking a pull to restore the bowl to even glowing. Consequently, he gulped. This time it was he who did the coughing and when the smoke had cleared his coughs were followed by large, dark billows of laughter. Doubling over in laughter, the smoke flowed aro

[DoF Archive]

Date: 7/12/1999 10:16 AM Central Daylight Time
From: Kyttn


Another Step

The journey inward, to her heart, had taken it's toll. Her time with Percy hadn't been easy on her, but it had been necessary He'd always behaved as if he belonged only to God and when Kyttn told him that he was one of her people, that in essence, he belonged to her, as much as to God, he'd said, "Indeed, milady, I am yours," bowed low and meant it wholeheartedly, but perhaps not precisely in the way Kyttn herself had so done. Somewhere
between her lonely vigil in the wilderness around the Willow and this new adventure she'd found the paladin again, and he'd helped her, almost unaware, to find her center.


Once that journey was done, it had provided her with peace. The peace to fulfill any other destinies that awaited her before going, finally, at some nebulous future time, home to the Wispy Willow where her heart and soul always were. It was something of being divided, body from essence. But it was necessary.

And it had worked.


The outward journey continued, (for it had to be completed, even though the end result, being with Nathan, was it's foregone conclusion) was something of an easier trek. Or so it seemed when it began.

There were still issues Kyttn needed to resolve. Feeling responsible for Strider's death was the biggest. After that ... other memories would be a cakewalk. And so, Kyttn had a long talk with herself. And then she had one with Karteran, Eldarion's friend. Eldarion, Aragorn's son, was in no shape to make the trip. Until she met Karteran that night in the Outback, she'd believed he could have been her only guide. As it turned out Kart needed to
go. Things needed to be taken care of, back in Gondor. Situations ... rectified.


They'd met where the strange and unusual door was located and from there they'd gone to the Munro Deli - a last brunch before leaving. When that was done, Kyttn retrieved her few belongings from the Outback, Kart waiting for her -- his own brand of nervousness brought on by the place and his own memories keeping him -- outside. With a finality that she was wasn't certain of, she cleaned out her locker and slipped the combination lock into her bag,
promptly forgetting it's existence.


She didn't say good-bye to the place. Maybe that would be her biggest challenge in the end. Just then, she couldn't force herself to it.


The first leg of the journey found them returning to that hill. Barrow, really. It couldn't have been considered high enough to be a tor; though, Kyttn wasn't sure if there were bones beneath it or not. That place where the selfsame whining door stood. The door near to where she had picked him up for brunch. Passing through it tickled her fur, left her disoriented for a few moments. It had all been so full of Celtic style rites and turnings
that the cat in her was bemused. Karteran, having been this way before, recovered more quickly and guided her until she too reclaimed her full range of senses.


Middle earth was more than she had ever expected. And the first leg of the journey brought them closer to their destination. They were leery, quiet as they could be, but there was power around them, in the air and in the world. This Middle Earth, this otherworld that the Nexus had so casually touched, Kyttn sensed the building -- the darkness that took in what ever power it might and seethed until it might have it all.


As they traveled through the countryside, they discovered they were being watched -- that their presence was known. Once, they even found it needful to hide, cowering silently, breathlessly, while something dark and hideous passed overhead.


It was something Kart was sure was looking just for them. Passages into this realm were, after all, not completed without the greater powers in the land learning of them sooner or later. It seemed sooner was the unfortunate operative word.


They found a sign of good tidings not long after that. A glimmering Emerald left in the roadside for them. They paused not long after, off the beaten track to sleep. Fire-less, consuming little water for conservation's sake and eating little for the sake of their own not wholly comfortable stomachs.


Kyttn moved her hands through the air as Kart slept several feet away. Her senses said he slept when in reality he saw her there as plainly as she saw him sleeping. In fact, he was dreaming though he felt himself watching over her. His state of awareness was such, waking or sleeping, drawn so close to Aragorn, as they traveled, that the visions he saw in his sleep were those the Ranger Spirit saw from his turbulent rest.


The Ranger she was traveling to see, therefore, was watching Kyttn as much as his own son was. Both then, saw that Kyttn's eyes were damp. Still, she moved through the steps of her kata; slow, graceful -- dance-like. Momentarily she let a wry smile slide across her finely formed, thin black lips. Bob, you never did see me dance. Then the steps took her concentration again. She'd been caught off guard when that creature had passed them
by, it's eerie eyes searching. Because of Karteran and his quick thinking they'd been perfectly safe and were safe now, or so she believed. In the wake of it all, she felt the strong need for practice. Honing her body to fighting in the human fashion had never been easy -- she'd been born to stealth, to strength, to rending and tearing and killing. Those were the skills she would use here in this Middle Earth realm, she was certain. But she
would need all the skills she'd taken from those in her past to succeed here. Strength from the orc, how to use it, how to apply it, would be especially useful in this land. Speed and finesse from Rand, how to handle a blade, how to remain calm even carefree in the face of the horrors to come; all important. And from Strider, Shanni and Ian ... how to endure when she was losing painfully, horribly.


When, in the quite she had worked her body until she ached in every muscle, she pushed herself beyond the ache to the place where suddenly, limbs moved again with ease, burned less and responded with what seemed almost instantaneous response to the mind's requests. By the time she fell into her bedroll, a thin futon of comfort between her small furred body and the cold ground, she was ready for sleep.

[DoF Archive]

Date: 5/12/2000 2:06 PM Central Daylight Time
From: Kyttn


The Night Way To Rivendel

Nighttime always was beautiful to Kyttn, but in this place, this Middle Earth it was more so despite Ellessar's wicked rule. The trees that guarded the East Road towered overhead, and seemed to almost touch the billions of blazing stars and planets as they walked.

"Come, milady. We must away from the road now to a more ... subtle path." Kart spoke softly as he turned to face her, revealing a quick smile. "This is all the time further I shall risk on the Road."

Kyttn nodded, her thoughts on the emerald they had found on the road. It had been left to them as a sign by a friend of Kart's that the bridge was clear and they could cross in safety, for a time. She was glad Kart knew these signs. "Lead on," she murmured. They stopped for a moment, as the ranger determined their position and next move. Then, after maybe fifty more yards of travel along the road, he moved off to the left into the shelter of the
trees.

Her stomach was letting her know that it was hungry. She'd dreamt of hunting the night before as she slept and woke with the need for meat; but this was not the time for food and she was willing to follow him, to trust him, to get done what needed to be done.

He softly told her, "We'll stay near the path, albeit not on it, fer the time ... but soon we'll have a bit of a climb that will lead us away from the road."

For some reason that disturbed her. "Is that … wise?"

"Wha-? To stray from the road?" Not stopping, but turning to look at her, his eyes as questioning as her own. She nodded and a smirk graced those Elven features of his. "Milady, as I said… I know this place like the back o' me hand. Rivendel lies not on the main path. The path we shall take will be more direct than any other ... although it will be difficult due to the climb."

Satisfied, at least in curiosity, she grinned. "Climbing's what Kyttn's do best."

"Is it, now?" Kart turned back to face the path, his grin more genuine.

She laughed deep in her throat. "Well, one of the things."

He gave a deep chuckle. "Methinks that sounds better, milady."

Perhaps it was the wood ... or the air ... the vibrancy of life, but she felt somewhat springy as she stepped along and enjoyed it very much. After a bit more travel, the road became less and less visible though it seemed to bend to the left, southeast. Kart instead took her northeast and the terrain became more rocky leading into mountainous territory. While the shadows there suited her and the view was pleasant, the ground produced more and more
rocks between the trees. She put her awareness into the journey.

Handholds she created for herself by the grip of her claws. The underlying knowledge that they were as much hunted as hunting helped keep her silent as they moved. The ground, grew from forest into stone and began to incline. Soon after the forest went by the way side, what appeared to be man-made path in the rock appeared, and made the circular climb easier. Kyttn was full of curiosity, wanting to know the name of this, the reason for the path,
everything, yet she asked not one question. She didn't forget them, though, and saved them up in memory for sometime when asking questions was appropriate.

A few times, they came across rocks that blocked the path. They weren't obstacles enough to block their way but required an effort at climbing. Once or twice as they went, Kyttn noticed that they passed small nearly man-sized caves. Caves which lead into the mountain for who knew what dark distance. A few soft grunted escaped her as they progressed. She was used to trees and even if she were familiar with the innards of some caves perforce from
her youth, she didn't like the look or the deep-smell she detected from some of the caves. It suited her fine that their way didn't take them into any of them. The smell of ancient decay surrounded them as the caves became more frequent. Once or twice, long decayed bones could be spotted in the far corners of the caves ... lying dust covered for a time forgotten.

Consciously or not, she moved as close to Kart as she could as they climbed, occasionally needing to make a conscious effort not to get under his feet. It was human anxiety expressed in a typically feline fashion. At one moment, she reached forward as though she would have taken hold of his tail had he possessed one; but withdrew her hand and shook her head making an effort to focus. He said nothing to comfort her but moved quickly with her
expertly making room when she needed it. He kept his eyes ever forward toward their goal.

As the road leveled off, symbolizing the peak of the path, they came across a wide opening into the mountainside. Her eyes ranged the opening and split their time between looking it over and keeping her eyes on him. The stench there of age and decay was far greater than before. Perhaps, just perhaps, from the depths of the hole, she thought she could smell a hint of something human-like … although certainly not human. Kyt didn't like that smell
at all. She tried to keep her nostrils closed, to breath through her mouth, but either way it was almost enough to make her gag. Certainly enough to make her eyes water.

He took her hand and it was a reassurance when her vision blurred from the stench. They moved silently, and quickly past the spot. She was relieved. She was used to the smell of fresh kills, blood and carnage … but death and decay were something always to be avoided by healthy animals. She noted that Kart kept hold of her hand even after they were far past the hole.

With the air cleaner and better, they began to descend, winding this way and that down the other side of the mountain pass. Kyt squeezed his hand and asked in a breathless whisper, "What was that?"

He smiles a bit to her, allowing himself a quick look away from the path ahead, then turned back. The path suddenly took a quick dip, steeper and narrower than what they had traveled so far. It curled down to the ground and left. Kyttn was beginning to regret laying claim to being a climber. Her calves ached with the effort of keeping upright through downhill motion. The trees loomed large overhead as he paused right there in the path and Kyttn
looked at him. "What?"

"Methinks this will answer yer question."

Through the trees a few tall figures a bit beyond the small, steep ending of the path. Kart didn't seem to be worried and urged her forward. Her brows shot up and her eyes widened a bit. She followed the point of his finger by tilting her head over his arm and beyond them through the trees she saw three big goblin-like creatures sitting in a circle. They looked for all the world as if they were about to rise up at any moment to attack. Startled,
she tugged at his arm, silent and perplexed at his lack of worry. It seemed to her they must move on and quickly without sparing another moment. They couldn't take such creatures in a fight after such a climb. Was he mad? Then she saw that the creatures didn't move nor even breathe and were very much like gray stone statues.

Cautiously, Kyttn sniffed and narrowed her eyes. There was no smell. Curious. There was no motion. Far more curious than afraid she took a step forward and glanced at Kart. Her brows were twisted in a "what's this?" expression so that he nearly laughed at the look.

He smiled. "Come ... let us investigate what we have ... stumbled upon." As they near, she saw why he was never worried. The goblins didn't just appear to be stone statues, they were quite clearly stone. They seemed to

[DoF Archive]

Date: 5/12/2000 6:45 PM Central Daylight Time
From: Kyttn


Kart smiled once more, then lead the way out of the place of goblins into the woods. Kyttn brushed a bit of dry leaves from her jeans and pulled the cloak more closely around her, following him. "We should come to another, more subtle, path shortly. It branches from the Great Road and leads straight to our first real stop."

The great rocks that had been their companions for hours deep were again beneath the soil and grass. Trees grew all around as they ventured ever onward. The road he mentioned came inexorably into view with each step. Her tail swayed side to side and since the going was easier, she could take note more easily of the terrain and the beauty of the land they covered in the moonlight. They went along this way for quite some time and she had been
looking to the side, noting that they were about thirty feet from the road--still well within the tree cover--when he stopped abruptly and she nearly bumped into him. "Wha-?"

"Listen," he whispered his command stopping her immediately. Her ears twisted this way and that, her body still but for ears, eyes and that tip of her tail as she listened. Slowly, the sound of hoof beats --a horse being pressed to its limits --fades in. Kart knelt down fast, and tugged her down to do the same. They hid and listened and the trampling horse became louder. Oddly, another sound accompanied it; that of small bells jingling along in
counterpoint to the thunder of the horse.

The fight-or-flee urge warred with her inner command to be still. She inched out her hand to grip his wrist... bells.. that can't be bad...right? her eyes said. Someone who wanted to sneak up on them, or hurt them wouldn't have bells on their horse's harness.

His eyes just told her to wait, as the sound came closer and closer. After all, some knew best how to lure their enemies out into the open. Her ears were intent upon the sound, focused, listening. Just as those thoughts passed through their head, a rider and his horse flew by, bells a-ringing. The rider's long, blond hair flowed behind him:

"Ainvar!" The elf by the felinoid's side called out. Kyttn, though startled by the breaking of the silence was also pleased she had been right. She recognized the name of Kart's friend; but, remained still. Her auburn mane curled tightly beneath the hood of her cloak.

The horse was immediately brought to a stop and spun around. The rider trotted quickly over to the side of the road where that call came from. As the rider moved into view, Kyttn knew he could see Kart’s figure: tall, fair and dressed just as Strider used to dress but for the hat and pipe. She kept her eyes on Ainvar, uncertain yet that she could trust him. She watched them approach and greet one another, right arms snagged in the Ranger
greeting. Their conversation was soft and low but she caught ever word of their small talk.

"How have ye been, Karteran?"

"Not bad, Ain. And yerself?"

"Can't complain." Why did men always say that? Every woman she knew could complain instantly… Kyttn’s smirk was full, but silent. Then Kart gave her away, grinning ear to ear.

"Tis Kyttnayah here."

"The friend of Strider's? The one ye told me about, Kart?"

"Aye, the same."

Introduced, Kyttn moved out into the open and flipped back the hood of the cloak. Her auburn mane roamed free about her small shoulders. Her dual royal blue gaze fell on the Ranger formed not so differently from Kart or Strider. Ainvar’s weather-worn face and gray eyes were similar to how Strider’s were, but different in so many ways. He bowed to her and she noted that it wasn’t as practiced as the king’s had been; but it was very much
like his and Kart’s as well.

"Greetings milady. Tis a grand pleasure, indeed. Much have I heard o’ ye."

Everyone was always hearing things of her when she’d never heard things of them. It made her feel awkward and self-conscious; a strange feeling for the confident, relaxed felinoid. She smiled. "Thank you, Ainvar. Good things I hope," she laughed softly.

"Nothing much bad can be spoken o’ a friend o Aragorn's." He offered his hand.

She took his hand and inclined her head. "I'm honored to be known that way." Indeed, she was. To be called Strider’s friend meant a great deal to her. The few close friends she’d met while living in RhyDin these past – nearly seven! -- years had come to mean more to her play, or pleasure or curiosity.

"Indeed." Ainvar turned to Kart. "I hope I did nay scare ye."

"Nay too badly," Kart smirked at him. "And thank ye for the sign at the bridge... ‘twas worried we were that we might be ambushed there if'n we had been seen."

"Well," Ainvar said, giving a tired sigh, "The queen's hands have been roaming about recently." Kyttn shivered involuntarily as he went on. "Hell... one of her guards made it all the way to the river... but I scared him off. They have been out about on the road lately more than usual. In the past few hours or so I have seen naught of them which seems odd to me. The bridge has been traveled by them frequently. A good bit yesterday, but today I
saw only one cross it. And he was in a hurry."

Kart nodded slightly, knowingly. "We saw that one at Weathertop. He did nay see us though."

"Well then. Shall we be off to a more comfortable setting?"

Kart smiled, then turned to Kit. "Ye ready, milady?"

"Yes, absolutely," she said in a quiet purr. She was tired and her voice betrayed it. Kart shared a glance with Ainvar and the other stepped up.

"If'n ye are tired, milady, my steed may carry ye the rest o the way."

The tips of her canines showed slightly - as they did when Kyt was especially amused. "He might not like me - horses and I have a tendency not to get along so well."

"Nay this one. Horses brought up in Rivendel take a liking to all things good."

"If he's willing, I'd be grateful."

"Tis no trouble... ye may even take a nap if'n ye like. Kart and I shall be on either side o the horse, guiding the rest o’ the short way to Rivendel."

"Very well, then... maybe you should introduce us?" She smiled up at the taller man and beyond him his even taller mount. Heights had never been a problem for her but she didn’t relish falling off so tall a beast while dreaming.

"Very well." Ainvar took her small hand in his – which was rough and strong and surprisingly warm despite his having been riding so hard all night. He walked to the horse and held her hand up, palm flat in the event he tried to bite so that the beast might get used to her smell. She’d never seen Jack or Lirenel of Eranesse Estate do this, but their beasts were different sort of horses and her understanding of the horses of Middle Earth was
that they were of greater intelligence and wisdom than ordinary equines. "Silvanus, meet Kyttnayah."

She murmured softly, "Hello Silvanus," and watched for signs of sneezing. Instead of sneezing... the horse's muzzle nudged her hand, and even a bit of tongue flashed out to lick the felinoid's palm. She’d never been licked by a horse before and let out something close to a giggle at the feel of Silvanus’ tongue. She said, "I'm sorry I've not any treats for you, but I'd be honored if you'd carry me." Then she stroked his nose gently and with a
light touch scratched under his jaw with her other hand.

This whole time, Kart had moved back down the road a bit. He watched in the distance from where they had come. :

The horse nodded a bit, as if it understood and was grateful to her for the thought. Kyt had seen so many horse owners talk this way to their animals and it seemed sensible to her; but it surprised her that he actually seemed to understand. "Come now," Ainvar smiled. "Up ye go."

Kyt let him show her the way and managed a reasonable mount to the saddle. The height was really cool for one so small; but, she tried to temper her excitement and especially to keep her claws withdrawn. Silvanus might find her goodhearted, but she was still a predator deep in that good heart and she’d had horse meat before. After she was up, Ainvar moved and stood in front of the horse a moment, gently petting the forelock between his eyes.
"Now ye be very well to Kyttnayah. She be a very special guest." Once again the steed nodded as if he understood.

Ainvar looked over to his friend and called out, "Ye coming Kart?" Kart held up a hand, listening where he stood then, after a few more seconds, he turned and came over.

"Forgive the delay. I just thought I heard something, but it was naught. Let’s be off." Kart took the right side, and Ainvar the left. The three started to make the short way up the road to the ford of Loudwater, The distance passed by very quickly. The road went over a small hill up ahead that was surrounded by willows which hung over the road as if a gateway to some place beyond.

The rolling motion of the horse was very soothing and Kyttn - despite herself - found her eyes growing heavier. She didn’t want to miss anything, but wondered in part if it weren’t the nature of the place to make her drowsy. Neither Kart nor Ainvar spoke although once or twice Kyt glanced down and caught Kart looking over his shoulder to the road behind. As they came to the peak of the hill, the willows all about them, the steady if slight
sound of rushing water could be heard. Kyttn’s hand drifted down to lightly brush Kart’s shoulder as if reassuring herself of his presence when the horse kicked a rock and roused her from her doze. Kart smiled up to her, his eyes gleaming in the moonlight. She blushed under her fur though it was hidden by the shadow the blocked moon cast over her face.

She could smell the water and took a glance back at the willows. It reminded her poignantly of somewhere so important it wrenched at her heart. Must be because I need sleep so badly, she told herself.

Kart had turned his attention to the road as the Bruinen came into view. The willows and the hill faded behind them. The trees receded their press on the side of the road a bit and now on either side was a bit of field with flowers and tall grass. It was all quite beautiful in the moonlight all the way up to the river bank. Kyttn let out the tiniest of sighs. Kart heard she knew but said nothing but when he looked up she was smiling at the field
her eyes searching the landscape.

The river was wide but as they neared it and were still about three hundred yards from it, one could see that it was very shallow at the point where they would cross. Kyttn was very glad she was on horseback if there were to be water crossing going on. The sounds of the place were so very peaceful and restful... as if time has no grip there. Lulled again, Kyttn found her head drifting down and snapping up... as she fought sleep.

Then, a new sound slowly and faintly faded into her awareness. It was the sound of multiple horses being pressed at a break-neck speed. Horses fast coming up from behind them. Kyt’s ears slipped back and suddenly she was wide awake.

"Do ye hear that?" Kart's worried glance flashed over to Ainvar.

As all three of them stopped to look back a group of riders suddenly burst through the willows. "Stop! In the name of the Queen!" The leader bellowed as he bolted forth and the others followed in kind.

Kyttn and Kart cursed the same thing at the same time and Ainvar already had his weapon out. Kart flashed out Anduril. Kyttn didn’t bother to ask if Silvanus could can carry them all. "We can’t win this!" She shouted down to Kart above the sound of the horses.

Ainvar yelled as well, grabbing his arm. "Run! Damnit, go! Get to Bruinen!"

"Ainvar, I can-"

Ainvar cut him off. "GO! They want ye, not me! Now go and I’ll hold them!"

Kyttn gripped the reins tightly forcing Silvanus to step back a bit, and extended her hand to Kart. "C'mon!"

Without further argument or hesitation, Kart hopped onto the steed behind Kit. "Let's go, babe."

She turned Silvanus, though the horse seemed of his own to know he must go and leave his rider behind, charged as he was to carry her. He sprang forward, his strong haunches launching them into a run. They fly forward. Kart continually looked back to see the riders bolt past Ainvar, not even bothering with him. Truly it was Karteran and Kyttn they were after. It solved some questions they had. They knew now that they were pursued because the
Queen had knowledge of who they were and why they might be here; even if she assumed they were here to do her harm when their real intention was to say farewell to Strider – having never had the chance. Then again, fate had a way of changing plans on one midway and Kyttn suspected they would end up doing more than just bidding the old King a fond farewell.

Dirt, grass and flowers flew from Silvanus' hooves. Kyt's heart pounded way up in her throat as they neared the water. Water. "Ohboyohboyoboy," her fingers curled in the thick mane. It has been a few years for Kyttn since the combat in her life posed a real threat and someone other than Tex was threatening her with physical harm.

Kart, Anduril still at the ready, just gripped tightly around Kit with one hand. His eyes were ahead on the road and the water now as hers were. The steed, having crossed this river thousands of times, flew across it, almost seeming to not even break the water's surface. Kit and Kart both were soaked through proving that what you see and what you get are not always the same.

As soon as the steed was across, it came to a stop and turned around. Kyt's eyes widened. There was nothing she could do to make the horse move on. Drenched and sitting like ducks in a pond they waited ad the Riders flew toward them, relentless in their pursuit. Kyt looked at the horse as if he'd broken down or something.

Kart for his part further proved Chaos Theory by leaping off the steed. His eyes were a full blaze of righteous defiance. Kyttn’s hands flew wide – all things considered a bad idea if there are people bent on your destruction chasing you down. "What are you doing?" She gasped. She’d meant it to be a yell but her voice came out barely a squeak of sound.

The riders were hard into the river, water splaying everywhere. As soon as the horses entered the water, Kart raised Anduril and plunged it into water's edge. "Aragorn," he whispered. "Aid me!"

The riders, already half way across the water, made it no further. A few seconds after Kart sank Anduril into the edge of the river, Rauros came to life. A sudden wave, far higher than the tallest rider, suddenly came from beyond view. The river's rage raced along and came furiously upon the riders to crash hard and relentless upon them. A minute passed as the somehow raging but contained river washed over them and drowned the riders from the
sight of their prey.

Kyt's eyes were impossibly wide in the moonlit night. The black pupils the size of reels, the slim circle of blue invisible in the dark around them. Then finally, the waters calmed, and eventually the rage that was Rauros became Bruinen. As the ford returned to its normal state, Kart just knelt there, gasping for air, clutching at Anduril like some knight who had wasted his last bit of strength on trying to pull the sword from the stone … but
still wouldn't give up.

The silence after the sudden thunder was deafening, and Kyt urged Silvanus forward to stop beside Kart. The horse obliged with Kyt's demand, gently coming up behind the kneeling man and nudging him with it's muzzle. The cat slid from the horse's back to the ground and like the horse, nudged Kart, with her hands on his shoulders. Kart moved forward a bit with the nudge, then settled, still gasping. His eyes closed.

"Come on, Karteran," she whispered. "Let's get you up on Silvanus. We should go back for Ainvar." Ainvar, who was all but forgotten, came running across the calm ford. Kyttn glanced up, smiling, pleased to see him well.

"H-how'd ye do that, Kart? I thought ye two were finished!"

Kyttn looked at Ainvar, then at Karteran, then at the sword that had belonged to Strider. Finally, Kart stood and pulled Anduril from the ground tiredly, still gasping for breath.

"Impressive, wasn't it?" Kyttn murmured, rising when Kart rose to be there if he needed support.

Allowing Kit to help him a bit, his pride long ago destroyed, he accepted her arm firmly around his waist. Leaning on her shoulder as it shored up his strength beneath him, his breathing slowed. He slid his arm around her small shoulders and held on. "Come," he said breathlessly. "Let's get to Rivendel before I have to do that again." Kyt's dark eyes glittered at that idea. Kart turned with her, and allowed Ainvar to get Silvanus so they might
make their way to Rivendel.

Ainvar gathered up the horse’s reigns and chuckled. "Aye, indeed, let us go. I’ve good food and drink all ready."

"You should ride," Kyt told Kart softly as he stumbled slightly.

"Nay," he countered. "It’s just a bit further. There’s no need …" While Kyttn was quite content to walk with him as they were, so she did not insist. He whispers into Kit's ear – so close -- so only she could hear him. "Wasn’t just me, milady ... he helped too."

Her tail absently swished back and forth as they moved until he said that. She turned her face toward him, her breath warm as it flowed up across his cheek. "You held the sword," she told him. She was not denying Aragorn or the possibility of his presence; but rather she was ratifying Karteran and what he had done.

"I felt him... there... with me."

There was a faint, faint blush of color under her fur. "The only thing I felt was really scared." She let out a soft laugh. It wasn’t completely true that the only thing she’d felt was frightened; but her fear for him and for Ainvar and for herself had been so consuming that Aragorn’s "presence" was a throb underneath it all.

"He said," Kart went on in a whisper that brushed her ear so softly it tickled, "’fear no’ and then Rauros appeared to topple our enemies." She nodded and tightened her grip around him. She’d never seen anything like what that river had done. Technology left her jaded, but magic had her in awe. Then, they came out of the trees and Rivendel was there before them in the glorious silver gilt of the moon. Kart's eyes just went wide with wonder
and forgotten memories. "I had forgotten how beautiful …"

If it weren't so dark and she was not so tired Kyttn would have marveled more. Though she could not say in the moonlight that it wasn't a rare and magical sight, this place of brightness after such fear. Ainvar went on ahead of them and opened the main door. "You need to eat and to rest," Kyttn said to Kart, an eye for him the whole way past Rivendel’s front doors and through her halls. Ainvar followed, closing the doors behind them. The smell
of freshly cooked food lingered all around in the air blended with the scent of Oak. Kyttn’s mouth watered and her stomach began to growl a-fresh.

Kart heard and laughing softly and said, "I’m hungry. Shall we dine?"

"Oh yes."

Ainvar, who had made his way into the main dining hall, called out, "Aye... I'm so hungry even Silvanus was looking appetizing!" Kyt laughed but reserved comment. It wouldn't do to say just how appetizing the faithful steed had looked!

"Thank ye, Kit, fer yer help out there." His smile was grand enough, but the quick kiss he dared across her lips made it even more sincere. They found a place to wash up a bit, his welcome clear in her eyes. "All right," he said when they’d cleaned their hands and faces and been lead to the table. "Let's eat." He clapped his hands together, that broad grin blending with the blush that crept across his handsome face.