Date: 8/12/1999 8:50 PM Central Daylight Time
From: CaediaThrn
~You'll never see.. the courage I know
It's colors' richness wont appear within your view.
I'll never glow.. the way that you glow.
Your presence dominates, the judgements.. made on you.~
It was dusk by the time she found it, swirling shades of deepening grey playing along the highlight of windows. The sunset maybe made the most appeal of the tiny house nestled into the woods.. but the colors of the rays painted the worn down exterior in the most delicious way. Odd to think that it was actually pollution that caused those beautiful colors.
~But as the scenery grows, I see in different lights..
The shades and shadows undulate in my perception.
My feelings swell and stretch, I see from greater heights..
I understand why I am still too proud to mention~
~To you~
She stepped into the doorway quietly.. boards creaking lightly under the latex boots as she peered around. There were cobwebs everywhere, wonderful! There was a rocking chair left in the corner, none too stable looking, but with all the things she'd done to the Outback, she could make quick work of that. She loved working now, it was toning her up and giving her muscles more than her usual workouts had. Those
and the cleaning well... watch out bad guys! Plus it hid her mind from the pain.
~You say you understand.. but you don't.. understand.
You say you'd never give up, seeing eye.. to eye.
But never.. is a promise.. and you, can't afford to lie.~
The rest of the cottage house was about the same condition as the outside, just not as sun worn. All of that she could easily fix, and planned to.. maybe. She was still in the thought process. She didn't want to stay in the Outback any longer.. there was too much stress there, and too many memories.
~You'll never touch.. these things that I hold.
The skin of my emotions lies beneath my own.
You'll never feel the heat of this soul..
My fever burns me deeper than I ever shown~
~To You~
The cottage was simple enough.. three bedrooms, one of which caught her interest the most.. it was a small sized room, nothing to write home about, but the ceiling was interesting. It had two lowered blocks in the ceiling right above two very broken down beds.. as if there had been twins here and they had their own space to put posters (even tho posters weren't made in Rhydin this present time). An idea was
plotting in the Thorn mind.
~You say don't fear your dreams.. it's easier, than it seems.
You say you'd never let me fall.. from hopes.. so high.
But never.. is a promise.. and you.. can't afford, to lie.~
Tomorrow. Tomorrow was the day she'd spend on this place, it was too close to dueling time to start now. Besides, there wasn't dueling tomorrow, and she could spend all day and night there. With a grin, she wandered back through the forest towards her old home, a new smile made for new hopes.
~Caedia~
Never take away everything a person has..
cause when a person has nothing to lose,
that's when they're most dangerous.
Over the river... (Caedia)
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Re: Over the river... (Caedia)
Date: 8/23/1999 4:25 PM Central Daylight Time
From: CaediaThrn
"Anna."
The name whispered to her from the tops of the trees.. seemingly everywhere at once. Since she'd entered the forest and begun work on her house, she felt a strange sensation.
"Anna, come home."
She stopped in the middle of the clearance, silver eyes peering around nearly wide as if to assure herself that she was here.. in the present. The axe in her hand trembled a moment as she shuddered, the wind dragging her hair along her cheeks as if to comfort.
Neteio was gone. So was that family.. but there was something else that was bothering her.. something that was so engrained as her life as Anna had been.
She was being watched. Every force alive, and every instinct that coursed through her veins gave her the impression. Step sweetie, we're just going to get wood. Of course even the voices in her head sounded a bit creepy at the moment.. it was probably the hard work she'd done today that refused to let her relax. Adrenaline was still lively pumping through her form as she had set off to gather wood for her fireplace.
"Anna."
She nearly cried out that time, the voice so close to her side that she whirled to face that set of trees. Nothing.. not a stir in the leaves of the accused tree.. not even the wind was blowing at the moment to give that impression. She felt like one of those actors who in a movie had suddenly lost track of the present and had flashed back to a scene previous in their life. This one led to a brief blackout as if her eyes didn't want to
detract from the ears sensibilities.. like when one closes their eyes to feel the touch of a lover better.
She took in a deep breath, leaving her eyes open this time.. and squared her shoulders. Come on.. just a few more steps. Didn't know the clearing was so big did you? The voice was attempting humor, flattering almost if she wasn't so frustrated. The next the voice spoke, she was almost startled at the old rhyme that began.
Left.. left..
She was no longer in the woods, instead she was hazily tripping through a cluttered hallway. Beggars on one side, a drunk with last nights dinner spread all around him, and several women barely dressed trying to get a bit more money before the morning came. It was like she was walking with convex glasses on, the hallway appearing the biggest in the middle, the rest squeezing into minature size on the edges.
~Daddy's gonna take you hiiiiigh home. Gonna leave you breezing. Come slide inside my world, take my fingers and we'll go. Daddy's gonna take you hiiiiiiigh home.~
She hated that song and wanted more than ever to be drowning in the abyss she now knew. Finally she reached the end of the hallway and slammed open the door. 08. That was her newest home, so far. The room was decorated sparingly, meaning a broken down couch in the middle.. a refurnished table that had been salvaged from the dump, and the carpet was done in an artsy pattern of cigarette burns. Two bodies were entangled in their own world,
oblivious to the fact that the few other people in the room were watching them. There was no tv, that, was their cable.
She started to turn for the one and only bedroom, but was stopped midway in the half kitchen by a woman grabbing her as she stumbled and kissing her. Caedia almost pushed her away until she tasted the cocaine powder still clinging to her lips and at once pulled her tighter kissing her deeper.
I left my wife and kids at home without any bread, do you think I was right... right?
Direct contact with that drug gave her an instant boost on her already drugged up state.. the blissful feeling recieved, she pushed the woman back ending the kiss as abruptly as it began.
"Sable?" The groggy woman muttered confused, her arms still reaching.
From: CaediaThrn
"Anna."
The name whispered to her from the tops of the trees.. seemingly everywhere at once. Since she'd entered the forest and begun work on her house, she felt a strange sensation.
"Anna, come home."
She stopped in the middle of the clearance, silver eyes peering around nearly wide as if to assure herself that she was here.. in the present. The axe in her hand trembled a moment as she shuddered, the wind dragging her hair along her cheeks as if to comfort.
Neteio was gone. So was that family.. but there was something else that was bothering her.. something that was so engrained as her life as Anna had been.
She was being watched. Every force alive, and every instinct that coursed through her veins gave her the impression. Step sweetie, we're just going to get wood. Of course even the voices in her head sounded a bit creepy at the moment.. it was probably the hard work she'd done today that refused to let her relax. Adrenaline was still lively pumping through her form as she had set off to gather wood for her fireplace.
"Anna."
She nearly cried out that time, the voice so close to her side that she whirled to face that set of trees. Nothing.. not a stir in the leaves of the accused tree.. not even the wind was blowing at the moment to give that impression. She felt like one of those actors who in a movie had suddenly lost track of the present and had flashed back to a scene previous in their life. This one led to a brief blackout as if her eyes didn't want to
detract from the ears sensibilities.. like when one closes their eyes to feel the touch of a lover better.
She took in a deep breath, leaving her eyes open this time.. and squared her shoulders. Come on.. just a few more steps. Didn't know the clearing was so big did you? The voice was attempting humor, flattering almost if she wasn't so frustrated. The next the voice spoke, she was almost startled at the old rhyme that began.
Left.. left..
She was no longer in the woods, instead she was hazily tripping through a cluttered hallway. Beggars on one side, a drunk with last nights dinner spread all around him, and several women barely dressed trying to get a bit more money before the morning came. It was like she was walking with convex glasses on, the hallway appearing the biggest in the middle, the rest squeezing into minature size on the edges.
~Daddy's gonna take you hiiiiigh home. Gonna leave you breezing. Come slide inside my world, take my fingers and we'll go. Daddy's gonna take you hiiiiiiigh home.~
She hated that song and wanted more than ever to be drowning in the abyss she now knew. Finally she reached the end of the hallway and slammed open the door. 08. That was her newest home, so far. The room was decorated sparingly, meaning a broken down couch in the middle.. a refurnished table that had been salvaged from the dump, and the carpet was done in an artsy pattern of cigarette burns. Two bodies were entangled in their own world,
oblivious to the fact that the few other people in the room were watching them. There was no tv, that, was their cable.
She started to turn for the one and only bedroom, but was stopped midway in the half kitchen by a woman grabbing her as she stumbled and kissing her. Caedia almost pushed her away until she tasted the cocaine powder still clinging to her lips and at once pulled her tighter kissing her deeper.
I left my wife and kids at home without any bread, do you think I was right... right?
Direct contact with that drug gave her an instant boost on her already drugged up state.. the blissful feeling recieved, she pushed the woman back ending the kiss as abruptly as it began.
"Sable?" The groggy woman muttered confused, her arms still reaching.
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Re: Over the river... (Caedia)
Date: 8/23/1999 4:38 PM Central Daylight Time
From: CaediaThrn
Caedia turned towards her with a slight smile. "I'll take care of you later baby, just let me talk to Paul real quick."
That satiated the woman for now and she turned to go watch the couple on the floor.
In her dream state, she was still walking.. heading for that door again, but in the forest, she had stopped near a tree.. oblivious to all her surroundings save for her memory, her life as Sable.
Back in backflash world, she was shoving the door open and blinking into the darkness of the room. Groping around, she finally found the switch and flung it upwards shattering the room with light. Paul was scattered on the bed asleep until then. Blinking his eyes, he peered towards her.
"Turn off the damn light and get out of here."
"Paul, I have to talk to you. Now." Even with the floaty feeling, she knew her voice was grounded. It was her birthday tomorrow.. but she had a present for him, and she was hoping it would stop the abuse that he dealt out.
He quickly dismissed that idea as his right hand swung around backhanding her to the ground.
"I said," his voice dropping low, "turn off the light and let me get to sleep."
She had gotten used to the beating by now, and even on the ground with her cheek and lip bleeding, her demeanor was the same.
"I'm pregnant." She had said it quietly.. flatly as if she were explaining that she were drunk instead of something so life changing. Well, she was drunk too, but that was a different subject.
As quietly as she said it, he still heard and sat in stunned silence for a moment. It was when that moment was up that the real trouble began. Suddenly he was up from his spot and dragging her up to slam her against the wall.
"Who's is it? Who did you do now Sable? Huh?" His growl was biting, but his hold on her throat and banging of her head against the wall scared her a bit more. It was just a modicum of fear then, the kind where you're afraid that you're going to pass out before you can defend yourself. She wasn't worried about dying, although that should have been the first thing on her mind.
"It's yours, I've only been with you." She managed to croak that out somehow, easily decipheral enough and it was true. Since Neteio, she hadn't been with anyone.. and foolishly, she had pretty strong feelings for Paul.
He backhanded her again, the gold nugget ring slicing her cheek once more and the beginnings of a black eye was already apparent. The rest she blocked out as best she could.. vaguely remembering him calling her a liar amongst other names, and the sheer pain that shot through her stomach when he started beating her there. Somewhere through the barrage of hits, she managed to land her hand on his neck... and just like the others, she pushed and
twisted.
His days of hitting anyone were over now.
Right? Right? Right or wrong for wanting to be on my own so I left... left..
Left, right, left right.. She left him slumped on the ground, hazily making her way back through the livingroom. She croaked out something to the effect of Paul was asleep now, blood dripping down her, and turned to head out the door. She was a mound of hurt and bruises.. cuts and a lost tooth.
It had taken her two hours and some odd minutes to walk back to the Pink Flamingo, a place she had left and hadn't returned to since James' death when she was 13. Now in a few hours she would be 17. I left my wife and kids at home withouth any bread, do you think I was right.. right? She had to repeat that whole mantra to keep her feet going.. barring the pain, barring the cold of the night.. and overcoming the urge to sleep. Right
or wrong for wanting to be on my own so l left.. left.. Somewhere in her mind, the phrase kept turning over without her having to think of it. After the first hour everything was so automatic, but her feet refused to move without it. When the pain got strong and overbearing, she sucked in a breath and kept up the phrase in tears.
She only remembered collapsing into the strong arms of Tony and then, only then, did her mantra stop and her tears fell to sleep.
____________
The Caedia back in the forest suddenly reacted, wanting to be out of the memory.. wanting out of that thought. Her axe swung at the nearby tree, hitting and digging and splintering the wood with such a fierce determinedness that she didn't even know she was yelling aloud with each stroke.
The tree finally fell, laden with enough branches to light her a fire for at least a month. The last wispy ghosts of the memory clung to her long enough that when she was done debranching and cutting up the wood, she still had energy left. Hatred fueled energy that was, and stacked the wood neatly by her house.
~Caedia~
Never take away everything a person has..
cause when a person has nothing to lose,
that's when they're most dangerous.
From: CaediaThrn
Caedia turned towards her with a slight smile. "I'll take care of you later baby, just let me talk to Paul real quick."
That satiated the woman for now and she turned to go watch the couple on the floor.
In her dream state, she was still walking.. heading for that door again, but in the forest, she had stopped near a tree.. oblivious to all her surroundings save for her memory, her life as Sable.
Back in backflash world, she was shoving the door open and blinking into the darkness of the room. Groping around, she finally found the switch and flung it upwards shattering the room with light. Paul was scattered on the bed asleep until then. Blinking his eyes, he peered towards her.
"Turn off the damn light and get out of here."
"Paul, I have to talk to you. Now." Even with the floaty feeling, she knew her voice was grounded. It was her birthday tomorrow.. but she had a present for him, and she was hoping it would stop the abuse that he dealt out.
He quickly dismissed that idea as his right hand swung around backhanding her to the ground.
"I said," his voice dropping low, "turn off the light and let me get to sleep."
She had gotten used to the beating by now, and even on the ground with her cheek and lip bleeding, her demeanor was the same.
"I'm pregnant." She had said it quietly.. flatly as if she were explaining that she were drunk instead of something so life changing. Well, she was drunk too, but that was a different subject.
As quietly as she said it, he still heard and sat in stunned silence for a moment. It was when that moment was up that the real trouble began. Suddenly he was up from his spot and dragging her up to slam her against the wall.
"Who's is it? Who did you do now Sable? Huh?" His growl was biting, but his hold on her throat and banging of her head against the wall scared her a bit more. It was just a modicum of fear then, the kind where you're afraid that you're going to pass out before you can defend yourself. She wasn't worried about dying, although that should have been the first thing on her mind.
"It's yours, I've only been with you." She managed to croak that out somehow, easily decipheral enough and it was true. Since Neteio, she hadn't been with anyone.. and foolishly, she had pretty strong feelings for Paul.
He backhanded her again, the gold nugget ring slicing her cheek once more and the beginnings of a black eye was already apparent. The rest she blocked out as best she could.. vaguely remembering him calling her a liar amongst other names, and the sheer pain that shot through her stomach when he started beating her there. Somewhere through the barrage of hits, she managed to land her hand on his neck... and just like the others, she pushed and
twisted.
His days of hitting anyone were over now.
Right? Right? Right or wrong for wanting to be on my own so I left... left..
Left, right, left right.. She left him slumped on the ground, hazily making her way back through the livingroom. She croaked out something to the effect of Paul was asleep now, blood dripping down her, and turned to head out the door. She was a mound of hurt and bruises.. cuts and a lost tooth.
It had taken her two hours and some odd minutes to walk back to the Pink Flamingo, a place she had left and hadn't returned to since James' death when she was 13. Now in a few hours she would be 17. I left my wife and kids at home withouth any bread, do you think I was right.. right? She had to repeat that whole mantra to keep her feet going.. barring the pain, barring the cold of the night.. and overcoming the urge to sleep. Right
or wrong for wanting to be on my own so l left.. left.. Somewhere in her mind, the phrase kept turning over without her having to think of it. After the first hour everything was so automatic, but her feet refused to move without it. When the pain got strong and overbearing, she sucked in a breath and kept up the phrase in tears.
She only remembered collapsing into the strong arms of Tony and then, only then, did her mantra stop and her tears fell to sleep.
____________
The Caedia back in the forest suddenly reacted, wanting to be out of the memory.. wanting out of that thought. Her axe swung at the nearby tree, hitting and digging and splintering the wood with such a fierce determinedness that she didn't even know she was yelling aloud with each stroke.
The tree finally fell, laden with enough branches to light her a fire for at least a month. The last wispy ghosts of the memory clung to her long enough that when she was done debranching and cutting up the wood, she still had energy left. Hatred fueled energy that was, and stacked the wood neatly by her house.
~Caedia~
Never take away everything a person has..
cause when a person has nothing to lose,
that's when they're most dangerous.
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Re: Over the river... (Caedia)
Date: 9/2/1999 2:18 PM Central Daylight Time
From: CaediaThrn
~ink stains my world
I'm living in you.~
Steps of a myriad cadence led her towards the cabin in the dark. Night voices sang their dirges as the holder of the bottle sang her own songs. Leather creased along leather, singing with the crickets as the darkness bloomed deeper before her. Her house at last. From out of the pocket of the leather jeans she pulls a matchbook, heels click against the dying wood porch that she refinished to be baby smooth. A scratch.. and a flame is lit,
leaving her to glow in the soft light of her porch lights. Six of them in all, and they seemed to be a second sun. Grinning slightly, she put her bottle down and headed inside.
~come dress me in
the sea of your complexion.~
She lit more lights inside, knowing that if any were watching through the windows, they could see her just well. The night was just a tad chilly, so she grabbed a thin blanket from one of the rooms and headed back to the livingroom. Back onto the porch.
So if they were watching, she'd give them something to watch. Dropping into her hammock, she let the blanket fall across the bottom and began taking off her boots. Leaving them beside her, she pulled off the leather halter top, and her pants, then sighed back into a lay with nothing but her birthday suit on. Covering her feet with the blanket, she picked up her bottle again and began daydreaming.
~bury me quick
deep within time~
While her body was free in the hammock, her mind was captured in another time. A time where all was lost to her.. where she was as she was used to. Alone. Empty. Old.
She had felt so dead then.. so hopelessly lost in a world that she hated and hated her. No one was around.. her occassional flings meant nothing save for something to pass the time with. Even those couldn't heal the hole that was left upon her heart. Something was missing. Something was wrong. Nobody wanted her.
~pattern my feelings
in depths of emotions~
She had just straightened up after losing her baby.. after the miscarriage she swore off drugs and alcohol, living a straight life. Well, as straight as she could. It had barely been over a year of her clean life when she was snatched off the streets by a walrus of a man. Someone who had treated her with what seemed like hatred at first, only it was hard core feelings of need. He needed her as much as she needed him.
She hated this man who claimed to be her uncle, for giving her a past.. for giving her a name that was solid, for giving her the pain of knowing that she was someone now. She hated him for always comparing her to some Tareth guy who she later found out to be her brother. And now... now she hated knowing that there was someone there for her when she still felt all alone.
She tilted the bottle back taking another healthy swig of the alcohol, feeling it burn down her nerves, she focused on that instead of the tears that streamed down her cheeks.
She had changed her life... she had tried.. she had asked and began to feel life.. began to feel more alive than she had ever felt.. For what? For this feeling right here. Bane no where to be found in a long time, and her brother.. well.. that was a different story. Maybe she'd just go back to where she had been and live there. Or maybe she'd just hide in her cabin till someone came to burn that down too. Who knew.
~Caedia~
Never take away everything a person has..
cause when a person has nothing to lose,
that's when they're most dangerous.
From: CaediaThrn
~ink stains my world
I'm living in you.~
Steps of a myriad cadence led her towards the cabin in the dark. Night voices sang their dirges as the holder of the bottle sang her own songs. Leather creased along leather, singing with the crickets as the darkness bloomed deeper before her. Her house at last. From out of the pocket of the leather jeans she pulls a matchbook, heels click against the dying wood porch that she refinished to be baby smooth. A scratch.. and a flame is lit,
leaving her to glow in the soft light of her porch lights. Six of them in all, and they seemed to be a second sun. Grinning slightly, she put her bottle down and headed inside.
~come dress me in
the sea of your complexion.~
She lit more lights inside, knowing that if any were watching through the windows, they could see her just well. The night was just a tad chilly, so she grabbed a thin blanket from one of the rooms and headed back to the livingroom. Back onto the porch.
So if they were watching, she'd give them something to watch. Dropping into her hammock, she let the blanket fall across the bottom and began taking off her boots. Leaving them beside her, she pulled off the leather halter top, and her pants, then sighed back into a lay with nothing but her birthday suit on. Covering her feet with the blanket, she picked up her bottle again and began daydreaming.
~bury me quick
deep within time~
While her body was free in the hammock, her mind was captured in another time. A time where all was lost to her.. where she was as she was used to. Alone. Empty. Old.
She had felt so dead then.. so hopelessly lost in a world that she hated and hated her. No one was around.. her occassional flings meant nothing save for something to pass the time with. Even those couldn't heal the hole that was left upon her heart. Something was missing. Something was wrong. Nobody wanted her.
~pattern my feelings
in depths of emotions~
She had just straightened up after losing her baby.. after the miscarriage she swore off drugs and alcohol, living a straight life. Well, as straight as she could. It had barely been over a year of her clean life when she was snatched off the streets by a walrus of a man. Someone who had treated her with what seemed like hatred at first, only it was hard core feelings of need. He needed her as much as she needed him.
She hated this man who claimed to be her uncle, for giving her a past.. for giving her a name that was solid, for giving her the pain of knowing that she was someone now. She hated him for always comparing her to some Tareth guy who she later found out to be her brother. And now... now she hated knowing that there was someone there for her when she still felt all alone.
She tilted the bottle back taking another healthy swig of the alcohol, feeling it burn down her nerves, she focused on that instead of the tears that streamed down her cheeks.
She had changed her life... she had tried.. she had asked and began to feel life.. began to feel more alive than she had ever felt.. For what? For this feeling right here. Bane no where to be found in a long time, and her brother.. well.. that was a different story. Maybe she'd just go back to where she had been and live there. Or maybe she'd just hide in her cabin till someone came to burn that down too. Who knew.
~Caedia~
Never take away everything a person has..
cause when a person has nothing to lose,
that's when they're most dangerous.
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Caedia's back, and you're gonna get in trouble.. (Caedia)
Date: 9/16/1999 9:03 PM Central Daylight Time
From: CaediaThrn
~Don't.. walk.. too close. Don't breathe...... so soft, and don't... touch so sweet~
She was tired of being locked up in her cabin, she had made most of the fixings she had wanted, and was keeping herself in tune by practicing on her mokujin she had created in the front yard. The rest of the time she spent lazily hanging around unhindered by clothing in the hammock, might as well enjoy the last of the good weather before it got cold.
~and don't.. sing. Don't lay...... oh so near.. Please... don't let me fall... in love with you, again~
She was content with her singing for the moment.. idly getting dressed in her favorite silver body suit, this one without sleeves and much more shiny than the latex body suit. She was wearing her fighting boots, simple black comfortable latex boots that held her ankles firmly and packed a punch... or a kick for that matter.
~Please let me forget.. all those sweet smiles.. all of the passion.~
She had just finished taking a bath in the river nearby, so her hair was nice and shiny.. and was now being tugged into a half ponytail with tiny whisps framing her face. She was, to say the least, looking pretty durn good since she took the time off to gain a bit of inner peace. It was a new Caedia facing the mirror.. she wasn't going to waste away forever.
~all of the heat, the peace, the pain, and all those blue skies.. where your words were my freedom~
Upstairs in the attic room where she had converted the dips in the roof to be small storage places (one of which she herself slept in everynight.. all locked up like treasure) she had rediscovered the silver arm band she had gotten when she met Belzare. The sapphires glittered brightly against her tanned arm, accenting brilliant silver eyes.
~please... don't let me fall..... in love with you... again.~
Slipping that piece on her right upper arm, she paused in her singing to look at herself in silent contemplation.
~too many times.. I've cared too much.. I've stood on the edge.. And saw you held my hand.. knowing too well.. I couldn't hide from.. those.. eyes~
That sentance only brought thoughts of her brother... nope, she wasn't going to dwell on the past, she was on a mission.. a mission to find herself again.. The old Caedia, the one who didn't give a rats as--semblance of a rear, about anything.
~please... don't let fal.....llll..eease.. don't let me fall... in love with you.. again~
Spinning on heel, she strode off to the Outback to watch a bit of the Opal challenge her brother was involved in. She only had one problem, apparently the tapping of the diamond in the pad of her finger on the window attracted attention somehow in the noise of the Outback and Goon scared the living daylights out of her. If she hadn't been interested in finding out how her brother did, she would have left then and there. She switched windows a
bit, then finally went back to the good one to finish watching. Goons final appearance in the window prompted her departure, she had seen enough anyway.
Silver melded into the darkness which was fast becoming her soul.. and in the silence there was nothing left.
~Caedia~
Never take away everything a person has..
cause when a person has nothing to lose,
that's when they're most dangerous.
From: CaediaThrn
~Don't.. walk.. too close. Don't breathe...... so soft, and don't... touch so sweet~
She was tired of being locked up in her cabin, she had made most of the fixings she had wanted, and was keeping herself in tune by practicing on her mokujin she had created in the front yard. The rest of the time she spent lazily hanging around unhindered by clothing in the hammock, might as well enjoy the last of the good weather before it got cold.
~and don't.. sing. Don't lay...... oh so near.. Please... don't let me fall... in love with you, again~
She was content with her singing for the moment.. idly getting dressed in her favorite silver body suit, this one without sleeves and much more shiny than the latex body suit. She was wearing her fighting boots, simple black comfortable latex boots that held her ankles firmly and packed a punch... or a kick for that matter.
~Please let me forget.. all those sweet smiles.. all of the passion.~
She had just finished taking a bath in the river nearby, so her hair was nice and shiny.. and was now being tugged into a half ponytail with tiny whisps framing her face. She was, to say the least, looking pretty durn good since she took the time off to gain a bit of inner peace. It was a new Caedia facing the mirror.. she wasn't going to waste away forever.
~all of the heat, the peace, the pain, and all those blue skies.. where your words were my freedom~
Upstairs in the attic room where she had converted the dips in the roof to be small storage places (one of which she herself slept in everynight.. all locked up like treasure) she had rediscovered the silver arm band she had gotten when she met Belzare. The sapphires glittered brightly against her tanned arm, accenting brilliant silver eyes.
~please... don't let me fall..... in love with you... again.~
Slipping that piece on her right upper arm, she paused in her singing to look at herself in silent contemplation.
~too many times.. I've cared too much.. I've stood on the edge.. And saw you held my hand.. knowing too well.. I couldn't hide from.. those.. eyes~
That sentance only brought thoughts of her brother... nope, she wasn't going to dwell on the past, she was on a mission.. a mission to find herself again.. The old Caedia, the one who didn't give a rats as--semblance of a rear, about anything.
~please... don't let fal.....llll..eease.. don't let me fall... in love with you.. again~
Spinning on heel, she strode off to the Outback to watch a bit of the Opal challenge her brother was involved in. She only had one problem, apparently the tapping of the diamond in the pad of her finger on the window attracted attention somehow in the noise of the Outback and Goon scared the living daylights out of her. If she hadn't been interested in finding out how her brother did, she would have left then and there. She switched windows a
bit, then finally went back to the good one to finish watching. Goons final appearance in the window prompted her departure, she had seen enough anyway.
Silver melded into the darkness which was fast becoming her soul.. and in the silence there was nothing left.
~Caedia~
Never take away everything a person has..
cause when a person has nothing to lose,
that's when they're most dangerous.